From the Top of Snowden

Risk: The Modern Windmill At Which Obama’s A-Tilting?

2009-03-24T08:04:00.001-06:00

Wait. What’s that coming over the horizon? Oh. My. God. It’s RISK!!!!!

SAVE US SUPER-GEITHNER! PLEASE SAVE US! IT WILL RUIN US!!1!

Good, because if its one thing the market has never tolerated, it’s risk.*

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*Sorta wonky stuff, but the key is remembering that the “Risk-Reward” relationship has not changed. You want a safe investment? Fine, you just won’t get paid as much as a riskier investment. Hell, this is what Vegas is based on: you bet on red/black, you get 2:1 odds on your money. You bet on a specific number, your get something like 20:1 odds. I mean, really: Duh.

Thoughts On The Web, Politics, and Fads: Two Months Of Obama Edition

2009-03-23T12:17:00.001-06:00

I don’t want to be the one who always trumpets my “I Told You So” moments. In fact, if someone can find a ear-clangingly awful prediction of mine somewhere on the intarwebz, please point it out to me. I’d love to be chastened.

Enough modesty.

Back on December 8th of last year, I wrote a post called “The Obama Techno-Cool Bubble”. I wrote it in response to all the old establishment geezers wheezing rhapsodically about the large “base” of supporters Obama had managed to accrue on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, etc. These Eastern Seaboard/Beltway lefties saw a future of Total Progressive Techno-Domination, where every social networking and Web 2.0 site was used in the most ingenious way by the web savvy Obama and his coterie of techno-hipster Apple Store employees. At the time, my spidey-sense was tingling, and I said so:

Now, I know this spits in the face of all the hope we've been brewin' over these past few months, but can I ask: Can anyone prove to me that the entire Obama-netroots organism is different from other Web 2.0 phenomenons?
Show me one sustained web-event. Nearly all of them have a brief tizzy of wild popularity followed by a dramatic dowsing…

…There's a cruelly funny quality to this situation, where all these D.C./political types are giddy over the prospects of politics being permanently cool. I don't buy it. There's just gotta be a decline in political awareness…

…We millenials are a proud people, lazy and slack. We practically invented the digital poseur. Why should that change now?

And then, what do I see in this The Nation blog post from earlier today?

For a change of scenery [they had managed 26 whole signatures at the Brooklyn Ikea –ed.] we headed over to the nearby grocery store Fairway, where the three encountered considerably less enthusiasm. The customers were mostly Obama supporters, but few wanted to sign the budget pledge. Among the responses:

"Obama personally knows I support him. Trust me. I could call him right now."

"I voted for him, I gave him money, I'm a supporter. But I don't want to give out my email address."

"A this stage, I'm really disappointed with him. He loaded up the budget with earmarks and blamed it all on the Republicans!"

After thirty minutes, Erica had collected ten forms and Shanice only six. They were ready to head back. "I thought people would be more enthusiastic about Obama," Erica said. "They're suffering from Obama fatigue," Tremis responded. "The side effect is they don't want to hear about it anymore."

What?! You mean that a bunch of high-school kids, college students, and mindless Jon Stewart followers aren’t interested in becoming full-on political stooge—I mean, activists?

Here’s my theory on the whiplash: Obama (who is, relatively speaking*, a technologically proficient pol) ran a first-of-its-kind campaign. He used the internet as no one had done before: his people organized MeetUps, posted YouTube videos, ran a Twitter profile – it was pioneering in the most literal sense of the word. No one knew if all this digitizing would turn into success at the polls. Some people predicted it would be a success, but there was hardly a guarantee. It’s safe to say that every campaign from here on out will have a large tech contingent to it (whether these politicians/campaigns learn enough to avoid becoming a tone-deaf parody of an Old Person Attempting To Be Web Savvy Even Though They Were Born Before There Were Three Network Stations, well that remains to be seen), and Obama’s campaign was the first to do it.

But then they went and screwed it all up.

One of the Rules of the Internet is that “Anonymous can be a horrible, senseless, uncaring monster.” A few rules that are more pertinent to my post, however, are:

17. Every win fails eventually.

20. Nothing is to be taken seriously.

21. Original content is original only for a few seconds before getting old.

Notice the theme? The world of the internet is incredibly ephemeral. This is the land where Tay Zonday was huge for a day, where random collections of letters become fully-accepted OED quality words (ROTFLMAO, WTF, FTW, etc.).

There are pieces of quality on the internet (insert chance to pimp Michael Yon heeyah), there are stunningly stupid/beautiful/tragic/uproarious/angering pieces of writing out here. But do you know what sites are guaranteed to have absolutely nothing permanent, nothing redeeming, nothing I’d like to show my grandkids one day?

Facebook. MySpace. YouTube. Twitter.

Any and every form of communication the Obama team used, that’s the gossipy side of the web. It’s the place where people place drunk photos, send lewd messages, express outrage over their favorite team being upset. It’s not where you go to form beliefs or think through life’s problems – it’s where you go to find out how fat your ex has gotten. It’s where you write something on your own wall while drunk, and then quickly take down the next day, hoping no one saw it (they did).

So into this nihilistic social void did Obama stride, asking for FacebookFriends and TwitterFollowers. He found them. There were plenty of people who were sick and tired of everything Bush, and this man came along and talked to them on the internet. They were smitten. They forwarded emails to friends, a few went door-to-door and recruited other followers. Most just looked at their Obama app every time they loaded up their Facebook homepage and felt like they were all warm-and-aware inside.

The election came, the results poured in: Our New Lord of Time, Space, and Internet had won. R0x0rz my s0x0rz. Then came the “I’m So Proud of my country.” Obama had millions of people on his rosters, millions of email addresses and websites at his hand. What couldn’t he do?

But then came the auto bailouts. The Israeli-Gaza War. The further collapse of the banks. Josef Fritzl, the Austrian Creepster Dad. Slumdog Millionaire and subsequent Oscars craze. Octomom. In comparison, Obama seems so October 2008, so immediately attached to a different time than what we are living.

There are, and there will be, cries of “foul” from the intelligentsia. They’ll cry that the man who is Leader of The Free World deserves more attention and higher respect than Slumdog Millionaire. I’m sure he does. But when you build a consensus on the back of the Land Of No Commitments, the Internet, you need to appropriately discount those numbers of support. Sure, millions of people followed you on MySpace and Facebook. But there’s a million people who kvetched about the de-planetization of Pluto.

Ignoring this, the President came out with an agenda that was worthy of a man who enjoyed Reagan-esque numbers in victory. Contra the press’s efforts, however, President Obama did not have nearly the amount of support he supposed he did. Part of his hubris, I have to believe, came from his internet numbers. He envisioned a budget-support movement where teens and grandparents alike would stand on street corners with signs that said “A Trillion Dollars of Growth We Can Believe In”. He thought that there would be millions of phone calls made by patriotic supporters to their loved ones, encouraging the passage of the stimulus. The problem? The people he relied on to carry the heavy load of political work had in reality only worked as hard as clicking a “Join” button on a website and taken an hour off from work or school to do the “cool” thing and vote for Obama. ACORN activists these people ain’t.

Your numbers mean something, President Obama, but not nearly what you think.

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* That “relatively speaking” is a HUGE qualifier. I doubt Obama himself actually knows very much about the Web 2.0-and-later stuff. I’m pretty sure he’s like most men his age: knows how to check his email on his Blackberry, has got his fav sites bookmarked (Espn.com, NBA.com, Fantasy Sports, Etc.), and perhaps is familiar with the idea of Facebook but sees no reason to actually post a profile pic. Good for him – he’s in his forties, after all. But to think that he’s some Digg moderator or has an RSS feed in the hundreds is the height of asininity.

The State: “If Something’s Fixed, Break It!”

2009-03-18T15:00:00.001-06:00

One of the biggest problems facing America today is the practice of commercial pilots carrying firearms. The idea that these men and women are wielding weapons at 30,000 feet, with hundreds of lives on the line, it’s infuriating.

I haven’t even mentioned the dozens of times where a pilot abused his firearms-privileges off the plane or the 10-12 times where the pilot used his gun to threaten and berate either his stewards or his passengers.

Have you guys heard about this?

What, you haven’t?

Wonder why?

Because nothing’s ever happened, that’s why.

But don’t worry: the truth never stopped the State from doing something stupid.

In Defense of Distrust in Government

2009-03-18T14:17:00.001-06:00

Cato, as is their wont, has been churning out some goooood stuff in the face of all this rising statism. To wit, Gene Healy has this great piece explaining that a loss of faith in their leaders is a good thing for Americans:

When political trust declines, the D.C. cognoscenti typically wring their hands and hold earnest conferences at the Brookings Institution, exploring how best to restore the people's faith in their rulers.

But, as usual, the political elites have it precisely backwards. Declining trust in government is a good thing, something that Americans of every political stripe ought to celebrate.

I’d tweak him on that, though: I’m pretty sure that the D.C. cognoscenti only wring their hands when Democrats are the subject of the scorn. For GOP hatred, Dissent Is the Highest Form of Patriotism.

Tales of the British Nanny State, Part MCCLXXIV

2009-03-18T14:06:00.001-06:00

The Orwellian-sounding Advertising Standards Authority banned the trailer for Wanted because it glamorized violence.

This coming from the land that doesn’t blink an eye at a Muslim girl getting raped and beaten by her father, getting chased by a 40-strong mob for converting to Christianity, and still isn’t able to show her face publicly.

Bloggers Who I Read: Reihan Salam: A Volcano Of Dance-Passion and Energy

2009-03-17T12:27:00.001-06:00

As the sultry be-mustached tones of Thomas Friedman on Talk Of The Nation waft towards my ears, I write to you of a far more prescient and less darling-of-the-Upper-East-Side “moderate” tilt, Reihan Salam.

The first place you need to go is to The American Scene, where Salam blogs. One of the best conservative/libertarian blogs out there (and I’m not alone in saying that), Reihan’s always good for a pop-culture post sprinkled amongst really acute analysis of conservative thought and political action.

His latest column, and one that is straight lock-down awesome, is titled “Why Mark Sanford Matters.” Some healthy blurbs? Blurb away:

When Barry Goldwater ran for president in 1964, conservatism was a rigorous and demanding creed. Rather than promise tax cuts, Goldwater insisted on balanced budgets and sound money. After promising to get rid of any number of New Deal social programs, and after pledging to privatize the Tennessee Value Authority and other cherished infrastructure projects, Goldwater didn't promise anything material in return. No manna would fall from the sky in Goldwater's America. He simply argued that shrinking the federal government and reducing its power would encourage self-reliance, and that self-reliance would encourage the virtues of thrift and industry…

…My sense is that this is not a move that will help Republicans win elections. Just as LBJ crushed Goldwater in 1964 by highlighting the many middle-class benefits he put in place, Obama will certainly try to do the same thing to an aggressive budget cutter like Sanford.

Yet this might be the political argument we need. At some point in the near future, we will come to the sudden, sharp realization that we're not as wealthy as we thought we'd be. And while no one wants to balance the budget on the backs of the poor, an evocative phrase that George W. Bush once deployed against congressional Republicans, we might eventually be forced to trim the benefits we provide to middle-class taxpayers, particularly ones provided through the tax system. Sanford seems like the only politician, Republican or Democrat, with the guts to make that case.

Please, I’ve stolen too much. RTWT.

Reihan, though I’ve never had the good fortune to even techno-meet the man, also seems to be a hell of a guy to hang out with. Anyone who can hustle like this:

and give lessons like this:

And remix great 80’s movies themes like this:

Is worth my time.

St. Patrick, His Day in the Sun

2009-03-17T12:08:00.002-06:00

As it is St. Patty’s Day, and as it is that my identity has a healthy dose of the Irish (my father is the child of a German immigrant and an Irishwoman named Constance Dermody Daniels, my mother is a UK-mutt paired with a Choctaw*), today is most decidedly a day for drinking and carousing. But fear not, dear reader, I will not forget ye!

Top of Snowden: The Red Tops Edition

2009-03-16T14:31:00.001-06:00

(Explanation for post title right heeyah)

I don’t really know how I got hooked on it, but I somehow found a story from the Daily Mail of the United Kingdom. The format on their stories is such that they advertise a number of their other unrelated articles in the right-side bar. It’s at a level of addictionage almost like the Public Timeline on Twitter or Wikipedia. An example: these are the editor’s picks currently on the screen at the time of post-writing, unedited from the home page to my page:

- “A cyber sensation for the catwalk: World’ first robotic model to star at fashion show”

- “Hundreds of mourners turn out for funeral of 14th Century teenage witch whose headless body was discovered by archaeologists”

- “Spotted on Google Earth: Giant fish trap built off coast of Britain 1,000 years ago”

- “Pictured: Spud the hedgehog with a prickly problem – he’s gone bald!”

Like I said: 100% Grade-A Jumbo-Sized Awesome Sauce.

All ADD-addled internet-browsing aside, there were some fascinating stories worth passing on.

- A Pakistani Christian pastor gets his face bashed against his steering wheel by some Muslims…in West London. Britain responds in a classic neo-Orwellian way, calling the attack a “faith hate” assault. Look closely, America, it’s our future…

- One of the prominent “Bring Sharia To the UK” leaders is a man named Anjem Choudary. He’s an advocate of all the standard Islamist ideas: stone adulterers, all women in burkas, lashes to the drunks, etc. The Daily Mail managed to find some Facebook-quality photos of Mr. Choudary back in his college days. He went by “Andy”, smoked weed, drank Fosters, and enjoyed Mayfair magazine (WARNING: NUCLEAR-LEVEL NSFW), the British version of Playboy (Come for the nudity, stay for the straight teeth!). I’m skeptical as to this actually changing anyone’s mind, but hopefully it will pull back the curtain on the Islamist culture for some modern leftists. These guys aren’t religious zealots who yearn for their own Paradise—they’re identity-movement supremacists.

- In that same vein, this is just… awkward.

A Muslim who advised the Government following the July 7 London bombings has been arrested after an alleged stabbing.

You read further and see that it’s such a classic bureaucratic State screwup story. This was a man who was on the chief council that advised (read: browbeat) the Prime Minister’s office on counter-terrorism, and he’s writing letters to the BBC complaining that Abu Qatada was being unfairly portrayed. Yet no alarms were being set off? Gee, I’m sure glad The State is protecting us!

- The photo in this next story makes me so fuzzily happy all over. To balance out the real-stuff with the funny (I call it “humor yoga”), here’s an awesome case of the Culture of Paparazzi running into a man who Doesn’t Give a Crap About Popularity. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you… Alan Moore!

He's out tracing the perimeter of his Anti-Planar Gravity Hex Field with his Stick of Unrepentant WarGod Tears. JUST LIKE US!!! He’s doing it all out of obedience to his Lord and Savior, Glycon, JUST LIKE US!!!

- And, to devolve, of course, to the scatalogical once again, I leave you with this headline:

Will anyone sleep with my Down's syndrome son, asks mother trying to help 21-year-old lose his virginity.

Godspeed, dear Britain, as thee whisks thyself away to the verily bottomest of Hell.

Unwanted Publicity

2009-03-16T13:26:00.001-06:00

A small moment where the bizarre meets the personal:

That’s Josef Fritzl, the disgusting child-rapist-cum-kidnapper of Austria. I don’t care about that. That folder he’s unsuccessfully hiding behind, that’s what I noticed. It’s a Bindertek. Why does that matter? Because my father was near-obsessed with them. He had hundreds of them in his office Before The Internet, and the trickle-down effect of our household meant that my middle-school years were also defined by those bright-blue organizin’ fools.

Josef Fritzl having one made me giggle aloud.

That’s all.

More Photos O’ The Dead

2009-03-16T13:09:00.001-06:00

A propos of my Detroit post, I just found this collection from two French photogs of the Motor City. Time has a selection of them as well.

Let me say this: I think there’s a morbid fascination with Detroit that is allowed to breathe because of the “thank God that’s not us, but it’s still sorta fascinating, isn’t it?” quality to it. Once it hits the rest of us, y’all, let me warn you: it’s not Beautiful. It’s not Tragic. It Sucks.

20/20’s Bailouts and Bull----

2009-03-14T17:58:00.001-06:00

I must pass on the link to the John Stossel opus from last night. Since it’s from broadcast-dinosaur-television land, hopefully it speaks in those mythical geezer tones that register on the old-person bandwidth, and maybe we can gain some real political traction for liberty.

He touched on the bailouts, road privatization, universal pre-k education, the border dispute, medical marijuana, and the “land of opportunity”, all based on Reason’s own vids. In fact, Reason gets pretty heavily blurbed and referenced throughout the whole thing.

GOP and Big Business: Too Late to Quit

2009-03-14T16:51:00.001-06:00

It’s gotta be too late for this kind of stuff. You ruined your liberty-narrative GOP, when you passed a trilli to Big Pharma in your own congress.

A Tale of Two States

2009-03-14T16:40:00.001-06:00

A man who I greatly respect (and will remain nameless at this point in time) saw the writing on the wall. His state was going down. Unsustainable governmental fiscal policy, racial strife, a growing government bureaucracy-- these are the kinds of wounds and burdens a state can’t easily shrug off. Unlike most men in this world, this man had the principles to act on his thoughts. He took his family and moved to Colorado.

But why not stick it out and try and change things, I asked him once. Surely a man of your mind and instincts would be vital to the recovery of your beloved home?

His response? He didn’t think anyone in government “got it”. Namely, he wanted to see someone in government admit that there had to be big changes in the way the government would work in the future. He wanted to see an effort to return to first principles, to fundamental values. He wanted to see a Dave Ramsey in office: someone who basically said:

“Guys, I know we’ve had a lot of really nice programs and policies over the past 20 years. But we can’t afford it. Government is no different from your household: we simply can’t keep spending money that we don’t have. You can’t be making $40,000 a year and have $16,000 credit card bills. If you were in debt, you’d have to sell the new Jetta and buy a used Honda. You’d have to stop going to concerts and movies. You’d buy bulk food and mainly eat in rather than eat out. Again, we’re no different. So here’s what we’ll do. We’ll cut out 50% of our unemployment funds and 75% of our farm subsidies. We’ll fire 15% of our teachers. We’ll cut a quarter of our health-care obligations. We’ll cut a percentage of our sales tax too. I know it hurts. Those are important programs and people. They do a lot for our world*, but we simply cannot afford them. I wish we could keep them. Hell, I wish every one of you could have a new F-250 truck, a lake house, and money for private colleges. I’d want that life. But guess what-- you and I can’t afford that life. The only way you can afford it is if you MAKE A LOT OF MONEY. You want that life? Go produce something of value (here’s an idea), sell it, and buy all that dream stuff with the profits. Otherwise, suck it up and make do with what you got. And trust me when I say that our state government will do the same.”

He saw none of that. What he saw instead was partisan bickering over meaninglessly small debates when the tsunami-wave was bending over the city skyline. He saw the current leadership whinging about how the prior administration was really at fault, so none of the blame really resides with the avowed leader. He saw the eventual collapse, something that surprised many people but was quite obvious in retrospect.

I’ve delayed revealing where this man was, but I’m afraid its become obvious. This man moved his family out of the suburbs of Detroit in 1991. Over the past few years, passing in conversation, we’ve both noted how the attitudes and views of the Mitten State have broken past the state’s borders and bleed to the rest of America.

Welcome to the Michiganization of America. As residents of the state will tell you, it’s depressing and deadening and awful and lonely and wistful.

But it’s home, right?

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*Debatable, but it fits with the rhetoric of a politician, no?

Friday Links: Eff The Police Edition

2009-03-13T12:39:00.001-06:00

Aaaand, here’s where I get my Friday depression-inducement posts out before the weekend. Today’s first topic: Police Brutality!

- So, I’m assuming most of you have seen the video of the Seattle cop “defending” himself against a 15-year old girl (WARNING: Graphic State Violence Y’all):

Well, Norm Stamper, retired police chief of Seattle, has a great take on the phenomenon of police violence. His bottom line?

So, why did I abuse the very people I'd been hired to serve?

Not to get too psychological, I did it because the power of my position went straight to my head; because other cops I'd come to admire did it; and because I thought I could get away with it. Which I did--until a principled prosecutor slapped me upside the head and demanded to know whether the U.S. Constitution meant anything to me.

It comes down to this: real cops, those with a conscience, those who honor the law, must step up and take control of the cop culture.

Amen and amen. My only quibble is that he thinks it has to be cop-driven change. I think the increasing prevalence of video cameras and YouTube will be the ultimate driver of change. I don’t see cops changing too much on their own. What will happen, though, is that the amount of brutality-videos will rise and public sentiment against the cops will grow to the point where even their thick-headed unions will recognize they have to self-police (groanpun) if they wish to have any public trust. At least I hope this happens.

- This is a fresh story, hot off the presses, and local! A Denver cop accused of jumping on the back of a handcuffed teen, was acquitted today. I don’t mean “jumping" as in piggy-back either: the teen was handcuffed, on his stomach, and the cop, allegedly, just up and jumped on his back like it was an Urban Rebounder. The kid got broken ribs and killed his kidney. He still has to piss into a bag today. His crime? Drinking a beer.

The part that irks me is that the cop was acquitted because the defense proved that the other two cops who testified against Officer Porter were colluding in a lie to cover up their own brutality. Okay, great. The kid’s still got a busted kidney and, lest we forget, GOT JUMPED ON BY @#%@! SOMEBODY! Someone did it. There is blood that needs to be forfeited for this beating, and we’ve just eliminated one of the suspects. Don’t stop searching though.

I hope the family soaks the city of Denver for every penny they can get.

- And finally, from our New York bureau, a man was acquitted of gun charges because the defense luckily found out that the arresting cop was on steroids, took crib notes from Training Day, and dispense advice to cops on how to commit maximum citizen beatage*…on MySpace. Internet: the backlash begins.

Stay tuned for more! We here at Top Of Snowden know you have a choice in Depressing Stories About the State and Its Violent Excesses, and appreciate that you chose us! We hope that you will keep us in mind the next time you need a heart to be broken or an attitude depressed.

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*Maximum Citizen Beatage is one of the best band/album titles I’ve ever unintentionally written.

Glenn Loury: Stop With The Prisons

2009-03-13T12:07:00.001-06:00

Glenn Loury has a killer rant on the prisonification of America. No, that’s not right. It’s not a rant-- it’s a clear-headed stone-cold assessment of a national disgrace. If I were writing this, it would have turned into a rant. Loury’s a better man than I. He weaves in personal experience alongside Tolstoy in his plea to stop. putting. people. in. prison.

I actually welled up a little while reading it. It’s that good, it’s that damning of something (almost) no one in the middle or upper classes thinks about.

A New York Times Reporter Was Kidnapped in 2008? WTF?!

2009-03-12T12:39:00.001-06:00

This story came as a shock to me. I like to think of myself as a well-versed war watcher, but I had no idea a NY Times journalist had been kidnapped 5 months ago. Furthermore, that he’s been held hostage this long and apparently moved to Pakistan, and no one is reporting it, is really strange.

There’s no other way to describe this. It’s just plain weird that (a) the Times isn’t reporting it (b) the anti-war types aren’t reporting it (c) the war-supporter types aren’t reporting it (d) the internets haven’t really reported on it. It’s as if this didn’t happen.

I don’t even know if wars or military ventures can “nuke the fridge”, but if they can, the war in Afghanistan just did it. When a reporter from one of the nation’s biggest papers is kidnapped by Taliban-esque forces, and IT’S SWEPT UNDER THE RUG, our nation has officially gone to crazytown.

P.S. Not to be a cold-hearted cynic about this, but the cold-hearted cynic in me at least wonders if this incident has affected any of the Times’s reporting on Afghanistan.

Guantanamo: Thoughts via DFW and HDT

2009-03-12T12:29:00.001-06:00

I’m really torn about this story. One part of me wants to smirk and mock those who think we have a bunch of “innocents” locked up in Gitmo*, but the other part of me wants to say that the real point of the critics is, or perhaps should be, that it doesn’t matter whether these guys are innocent are not. Even if they are guilty, we, as a nation, shouldn’t be putting guys in a legal limbo in a foreign nation.

David Foster Wallace used to talk about there being a “baseline cost” of being a liberal democracy. For the sake of living in our (at least theoretically) free nation, we might have to suffer a certain amount of terrorist attacks/awful mistakes that are caused/blamed by our freedom. We shouldn’t, however, go back on those liberal values for the sake of safety. That idea, one of a base cost for the joys of freedom, has stuck with me probably more than anything DFW’s written. Freedom is a historical anomaly. I don’t see it written anywhere that I have a God-given right to living in both complete freedom and complete safety. And, if given the choice, I’d rather have complete freedom with episodes of tragedy than complete security with episodes of liberty.

I’m pretty confident that the “idea” of America is incompatible with Guantanamo. Maybe we got to this point through ten thousand miniscule compromises, maybe it was through several panics/frenzies brought on by national war. However it happened, the idea that established jails/camps in foreign lands carry the stamp of the nation of George Washington and Thomas Jefferson is…off-kiltering. I think Henry David Thoreau (two three-named authors in one post!) had it right when he protested the Mexican-American War by refusing to pay taxes. He somehow got the American idea: it’s not one of a society that must be preserved at any cost. It’s not one of national music and literature or a “national identity”. It’s one based in the idea of liberty, the idea that mankind, bearing certain amount of costs, can live unmolested by his fellow man. The individual will have the freedom to act as he pleases, take the results/consequences solely upon himself, and live by his own code.

When I load up Google News, I don’t see that world anymore. I don’t see that nation. The idea has returned to the books.

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*Every time I find myself enjoying the waters on the ACLU-side of this debate, someone comes and pisses in the pool by saying grade-A retarded stuff about the Gitmo detainees. Lookit: these guys are BAD GUYS. They aren’t chain-smoking coffee-sipping spoken-word artists, they aren’t dissidents. They’re assholes. We have a good debating point when we observe that our treatment of detainees is dissonant with our national ethos, let’s not screw it up with some good old-fashioned stupidity.

They Probably Stole the Hand Towels Too

2009-03-12T11:59:00.001-06:00

I can’t think of the perfect analogy, but the closest I can get for this is a house guest screaming at the host about the host’s shopping habits: Sirs, you can be forced to leave and a bill would be shortcoming.

Web 2.0 Shenanigans and Late Night Television

2009-03-11T16:59:00.001-06:00

This is a time-specific post, but it is fun.

For those who don’t know, I tweet (see in the upper right part of the page?) as csstieber. I follow ?uestlove’s twittering, and he’s working this little twitter-stunt on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon (who also tweets). They’re trying to set some kind of record by boosting bryanbrinkman’s following. The message is making its rounds around the interwebs, and since I joined at roughly 1,800 people about 30 minutes ago, it’s already exploded to 6,000.

Join the madness, or at least pop in and watch some of the web-community flash mobbin’ bedlam.

A True Tragedy of Modern Life

2009-03-09T15:28:00.002-06:00

From Radley Balko’s personal site* comes this Washington Post feature piece on infant hyperthermia, or the phenomenon of parents absent-mindedly leaving their babies in car seats, which leads to the infant’s death. Fair warning: I could barely finish this piece. It’s that somber and unhesitating in its look at a phenomenon that can only be described by words like “tragic” and “soul-rending”. It’s wonderfully written (Gene Weingarten better win some national awards for this piece, and the Post has been superb in their feature-length stories in 2009), and I encourage anyone who might be interested to give it a look: it’s the kind of story that periodicals/newspapers are made for.

Some thoughts/questions:

1. I know I talked about this last week, but this piece is fascinating from a pro-life/abortion debate perspective: while I find it disturbing that a VA prosecutor charged a parent with manslaughter for leaving his kid in a car, I have this question: if you are going to prosecute for the accidental death of a parent who loved his kid dearly, how can you differentiate between that and a third-term abortion? I mean, at least the first parent wanted his kid, right?

Also: is this really the best use of a district attorney’s office? Is this upholding the laws of Virginia, or is this merely a case where the law enforcement is acting less like Protectors of the Republic and more like the Police to Prevent Vice and Promote Virtue?

2. This story reminded me that, no matter how far we might advance as a society, no amount of technology can prevent some tragedies. Perhaps it is because we are so insulated from death and error that such stories are so shocking, but we mustn't let ourselves think we need all kinds of new oversight to prevent such stories from happening again. As trite and insensitive as it is, the saying remains: crap happens.

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*Seriously, I link to Radley’s pages many, many times a week. I try and only post to ones that I can add value to (through own comments and perspective), but I still feel guilty for mooching so much off him. Please, please, please go to his site regularly. He puts more effort into his own reporting and has such a razor insight into policy and its effects that you are missing one of the stars of internet newsmaking if you miss his stuff. Check him out. Regularly. Please.

Friday Evening Links

2009-03-06T18:26:00.001-07:00

I normally hate these kinds of posts (looking back at past “grab-bags” of my own makes me shudder*), but I gots a birthday to celebrate tonight (not mine), and I have a few tabs o’ interest I wanted to throw up before the weekend began:

1. The Economist, famed journal of reasoned-moderation and must-read material of “thoughtful” undergraduate political science majors everywhere, endorses the legalization of drugs.

2. “What if California got out of the marriage business altogether?”

Beginning with that line, the L.A. Times suggests, in the light of the kerfluffle around Prop. 8, subsequent anti-Prop. 8 riot/protests, further subsequent anti-Prop. 8 witch hunts, and furtherer subsequent California Supreme Court hearing on the legality of Prop. 8, that maybe the government should get out of the business of determining marriages altogether. *Gasp!* You mean that the State shouldn’t be involved in the personal details of citizens’ lives? Treason!

3. Some pretty sound advice from economist Bruce Bartlett, suggesting a carbon tax is far preferable to a cap-and-trade tax. I post this now because I’m getting the feeling that the cap-and-trade debate is going to get rolling in the near future, and we liberty-minded folks need to start laying track ASAP. Cap-and-trade plans, while allowing for companies to act within a confined area, already steal two or three intellectual bases in the first place, such as: who gets to decide where we “cap” the industries? Based on what science? Furthermore: what kind of provisions are in place to prevent corruption, especially considering the current brobdingnagian size and scope of the federal government? Do we really think that the U.S. government, which can’t even run it’s SEC right, is capable of monitoring “pollution credits”? There’s sure to be more to come…

4. Death of Europe Update: An Italian court sides with a Maghrebi husband, wife, and son, who murdered their daughter/sister because the girl wanted to live a Western life and had dated a non-Muslim. The reason the court found convincing? That the victim had been, in the words of her family, “beaten up for her own good”.

5. I’ve already made it well known that I’m strongly in the anti-abortion camp, so you’ll know where I stand on this story. For others, however, the article still presents some good thought-food. The difference between a constitutionally protected act and outright murder is, apparently, moving the child a few inches from the woman’s body.

That’s all from my side, have a good night and great weekend.

Oh, and Go Blue! And Minnesota, you suck. (pax Lileks)

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*That’s what she said.

Power-Literacy

2009-03-05T14:46:00.001-07:00

Our country is ruled by a caste of lawyers who are almost to a man (or woman) economically illiterate. They know how to write laws to redistribute wealth but don’t understand how that wealth is produced. They also write laws that make it easier for lawyers to extort money from productive members of society, and centralizing power to lawyer-politicians who use that power to stay in power.

-- Joel West, professor at San Jose State University and open source researcher, in a bangin’ post about the market’s response to Obama’s economic maneuvers.

I’d push it even further: who says they’re only economically illiterate? Does anyone think that the bureaucrats are technologically literate? Environmentally literate? Culturally literate? Stop me when I name one… fiscally literate?

The truth is that the State is run by people who are coercion literate. The only language they know is one of crowd manipulation and control. They know how to garner power, they know how to boss people around with it.

If you have the power of the sword, why learn about anything else?

Why I’m Glad Dr. Dobson Is Leaving

2009-03-05T14:01:00.001-07:00

I’ve received an email asking basically the same thing reader Goodbye said in a comment on my James Dobson post:

If you're going to declare your dislike of Dobson at least give some reasons.

Fair enough.

First, the bona fides: I had a childhood that was steeped in Focus on the Family. I listened to “Adventures in Odyssey” incessantly. Every day of the summer, one could guarantee that Young Snowden would be lying in front of his cassette-player, doodling in a coloring book, his mind floating in the world of ‘Whit’s End’, Rathbone Electric Palace, and window washer Bernard Walton. E-v-e-r-y day, without fail. (If you have no idea what any of that just said, just trust me when I say I was waaaay deep into the flagship children’s radio show for Focus on the Family.)

I also read dozens of Focus-approved books (Cooper Kids, anybody? Door In the Dragon’s Throat, whatwhat?!). I was a subscriber to Breakaway magazine, Focus’s teen-culture-watch publication. I saw “The Pistol” probably 30 times. I could name you Christian “safe for the family” alternatives to every major music act, thanks to my knowledge of the Christian culture. Like Sheryl Crow? Try Jennifer Knapp! Like 311? Try Pax 217! How ‘bout Korn? Give Thousand Foot Krutch a try!*

The only two cities I really grew up in are Colorado Springs and north-suburbs Dallas. Christian culture is what we do in those parts.

*Whew* Okay, pop-Christian dork status VERIFIED.

Allow me to destroy that status right heeyah: James Dobson is a bitter asshole.

Now to the why: Dobson represents everything that is scared about the modern evangelical Christian. When he looks out upon the world, he sees a God Loving People besieged by an aggressive secularist relativist enemy. He sees a binary world, one where it’s God v. Everyone Else. He sees, in short, the world the way Richard Nixon saw the world: it’s about survival of culture and “ways of life”, and principles be damned if they get in the way. So if that means that I go back on my word and endorse a guy who loathes my personage AND I loathe his, so be it -- from Dobson’s perspective, no maneuver is too low when The Gays And Atheists are running the schools or Marilyn Manson is instructing kids in school shootings: it’s Armageddon every day.

Additionally, this Armageddon is one of the Good Doctor’s own fabric. Dr. Dobson created the beast he claims to serve. What beast is that? For lack of a better term, I’m going to call it Evangelical Pride Movement. Dobson saw the rise of the ethnic-identity and gay-rights movements and sought to fight fire with fire. He created an organization that was based in the “We’re Here, We’re Queer” ethos of the Stonewall protest. He saw that there was a significantly sized group that was frightened by the changes wrought by the Baby Boomers, and he forged the catch phrases and buzz terms that would give his flock the confidence to survive the scawee scawee wuld.

The only catch: the fundamental faith upon which Christianity is built has nothing to do with identity in a socio-political sense. Contrary to what Dobson and Falwell and Robertson tell you, the Bible says nothing about how a Christian should vote. The Bible and one’s faith will surely inform one’s voting, but I challenge any one to find me the “The kingdom of God is like a 17% flat tax” verse I missed in the Gospels. Yet Dr. Dobson would have you believe that this world has decayed from its prior Christian Greatness because of the hippies, Derrida, and MTV, and that with the Bible as our voting guide, we can return unto God. This is a dangerous ideal that drives Christians out of the world rather than into it.

Furthermore, for a man who claims that “family values” can be empirically proven to be optimal for society, his position on several touchy issues is flatly anti-empirical. Peep Focus’s page on transgenderism:

Because "transgenderism" violates God's intentional design for sex and sexuality, we believe that this is a cultural and theological battle that we must engage and win. The modern "transgender" movement is systematically working to dismantle the concept of gender as the Bible and the world have always known it to be. If the transgender lobby succeeds, there will be striking consequences for marriage, family and society at large.

Lookit: I don’t know how God and Christ view transgendered people. There’s lots of good science out there that posits that transsexualism is a physical, not psychological condition. I don’t know what God intends for a person born with male sex organs but feminine hormones and chemicals in his (her?) brain. You get into some really heavy teleological stuff when you parse apart gender identity. What I do know is that positioning it as a “battle” over culture and theology is worse than wrong-headed: it’s either delusional or grossly cynical. I mean, my God, even Iran has a very liberal policy on sex-reassignment operations, okayed by the Ayatollah himself! I’m not a Christianists-are-the-Taliban like Andrew Sullivan is, but I do think it’s good to step back and make small comparisons from time to time.

So, in closing, any man who can claim majority credit for the creation/inspiration of execrable slime like Tangle (formerly GodTube) or “Christian Salt” (as an alternative to that damned ‘Kosher Salt’. Jews, they’re everywhere!) deserves my scorn.

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*The really sad part is, I didn’t have to do one second of internet searching to remember any of those bands, and I haven’t listened to any of that stuff in 7 or 8 years.

But What About Lorne Michaels and Tommy Chong?

2009-03-05T10:19:00.001-07:00

(h/t: the always-funny Criggo, via Five Feet of Fury)

Snapshot of The D.

2009-03-04T14:38:00.002-07:00

To those who’ve read this blog for a while, you will know that I have a weakness for the city of Detroit. It’s a sad weakness, really though. I have so many friends and classmates who are from the Wolverine State, and when you see how poorly the city is doing, how decrepit the Motor City has become, it stings.

So when you read stories like this, from the Chicago Tribune, you might just shake your head at the facts:

DETROIT — It may be tough to get financing for a new car these days, but in Detroit you can buy a house with a credit card.

The median price of a home sold in Detroit in December was $7,500, according to Realcomp, a listing service.

Not $75,000. Remove a zero—it's seven thousand five hundred dollars, substantially less than the lowest-price car on the new-car market.

but the numbers don’t do it justice (as much ‘justice’ as can be done to such an abysmal collapse). For those who’ve been there, you can’t forget what you see:

Would you pay $7,500 for either of the houses above? Would anyone, especially when there’s no hope for the future? No one see that city getting back to 3 million people with a revived suburbs and a vibrant core. The automakers are about to be finished off. So why buy a piece of crap and fix it up?

I found the above photo at the invaluable catalogue, Detroit Funk. It’s like a “Faces of Death” for a former Crown Jewel of America. Today?

I found this one there as well. It says it all:

Stone Cold Killers

2009-03-03T15:01:00.001-07:00

For all you readers of teh blogosphere, just know that, according to my congressman, all of us “killed all the newspapers.”

I didn’t know what was I doing when I was killing your husband, if that’s any small consolation Mrs. Mountain News.

I particularly love that Rep. Polis started feeling his oats and let loose some good guerilla rhetoric:

"The media is dead, and long live the new media, which is all of us," said Polis, a Boulder Democrat.

It’s a breezy cocktail of “Viva La Revolucion!” and “L’etat, c’est moi” best served with chilled left-wing triumphalism. *Slurps* Mmm, that’s nice.

“Excuse me. I have to go to space now.”

2009-02-28T12:09:00.001-07:00

Sorry for being so other-media heavy, but I’ve had an extra-helping of busy-gravy ladled on my foodweek. A peace offering?

And the even better follow up:

If A Prius Was Any Gayer, It’d Come With A Bleached Tailpipe

2009-02-27T17:08:00.001-07:00

My Leader To Whom I Swear All Fealty Has Another Missive For His Followers:

Lil' O'Reilly - Obama's First Week

Heed his words, America. Heed his words.

It Was Going To Happen Sooner Or Later, I Just Wished It Was Sooner

2009-02-27T14:56:00.001-07:00

Whatever your conception of God, I hope you agree with me that he (or He) is happier today because of this news.

J-Dobs and I are not friends. *Angry Emoticon*

Finger Lickin’ Dead

2009-02-27T12:20:00.001-07:00

Another media rehabilitation on Jimmy Kimmel Live with a side of awesome sauce, please:

A Hangover IS An Injury

2009-02-25T11:59:00.001-07:00

Steely Hands with Countdown to Singularity*

2009-02-23T17:23:00.002-07:00

The Brits have a wonderful talent for writing ledes. Another for the possible “best of” year-end list:

Autonomous military robots that will fight future wars must be programmed to live by a strict warrior code or the world risks untold atrocities at their steely hands. [emphasis added]

/futurismlolz

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*I think that’s the first, and last, time I’m ever going to reference a Fagen-Becker joint.

Iraq-Vet Loses His House Because He Smoked Weed

2009-02-23T17:17:00.001-07:00

This is idiocy of the worst kind. Who gives an Iraq-vet, one who lost both his legs, a brand new house but then rescinds the offer because of pot?!

Homes For Our Troops does the Lord’s work 99.999% of the time. They give handicap-adjusted houses to our nation’s most deserving citizens, severely wounded veterans. I think HFOT is a wonderful institution.

Yet…

I don’t see that Mr. West’s worthiness of receiving a free house (and all our wounded vets deserve such treatment, btw) is diminished in the least by his use of cannabis. It’s in effect saying: “although you have made a sacrifice far larger than we could ever imagine, we’ll give you guys the world as long as you obey our standards, even if you might be really damaged emotionally or psychically from the horrors of combat.” Just asinine.

Maybe it’s a bureaucratic issue, that HFOT has a bylaw that forbids any assistance to convicted criminal veterans. If so, the bylaw needs to go. If this was an executive decision, then they need to realize how over-the-top this issue is.

If this story galls you as it does me, here’s the contact page on Homes For Our Troops site. A great group like theirs shouldn’t be sidetracked by outdated social norms.

Not Fair

2009-02-21T12:28:00.001-07:00

I can’t compete with this:

Nigerian web scam bilked Utah out of $2.5M

It’s a perfect headline. P-E-R-F-E-C-T.

Not To Get Ahead Of Ourselves…

2009-02-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

… but I’m just glad that we finally recognize Obama’s rightful position. I mean, Jesus was never The First Black President, so why should he complain?

An Education Pill

2009-02-20T16:44:00.001-07:00

For today’s installment of As The Drug War Continues To Suck, we look at methylenedioxymethamphetamine (MDMA), better known as Ecstasy, the “Disco Biscuit”, the “hug bug”, or simply “e”.

1. The first thing you should know is that most, if not all, of the conventional wisdom on MDMA is wrong. I know that I grew up hearing the statistics that one night of using MDMA could be lethal. Well, the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine study that legend is based on? It’s a crock of crap. Instead of giving primates a pill of MDMA, the doctor injected them with overdose levels of methamphetamines. Two of the monkeys died, natch, and the medical community therefore, in a moment of the most blissful disconnection, proclaimed MDMA a lethal drug. Federal government ineptitude fever- catch it!

2. Pushed by one the most anti-freedom drug warriors in the U.S. government’s history, then Senator Joseph Biden, the Reducing American’s Vulnerability to Ecstasy Act (yes, the RAVE act, groan), which was targeted at MDMA use, eventually made its way into law as an attachment to the Amber’s Law bill. It has had a dramatic effect on freedom of assembly, since the bill allows for police to investigate parties where the notorious drug gear of “bottled water and glow sticks” are present.

Note, for all of my pro-drug Democrats, the roster of co-sponsors to the bill: 15 out of 17 are from the DNC.

3. The truth about MDMA? It’s been found to be beneficial to the emotionally distressed, people like veterans suffering from PTSD. Doctors and psychiatrists who partake of it consider it a “low-calorie martini” and “penicillin for the soul”.

4. It’s reputation as a aphrodisiac, “love drug”, or rape drug is vastly overblown. For every one person you find who describes ecstasy as a “six-hour orgasm”, you will find 20 who find it more of an emotional enhancer than a hormonal/physical enhancer.

Eisner quotes a distributor who claimed to have originated the name Ecstasy. He said he picked it "because it would sell better than calling it 'Empathy.' 'Empathy' would be more appropriate, but how many people know what it means?"

5. I’ll close with an editorial from New Scientist, hardly a cabal of tripped out rave-heads and Grateful Dead fans:

“IMAGINE you are seated at a table with two bowls in front of you. One contains peanuts, the other tablets of the illegal recreational drug MDMA (ecstasy). A stranger joins you, and you have to decide whether to give them a peanut or a pill. Which is safest?

You should give them ecstasy, of course. A much larger percentage of people suffer a fatal acute reaction to peanuts than to MDMA…

…This is a worldwide problem. We need a rational debate about the true damage caused by illegal drugs - which pales into insignificance compared with the havoc wreaked by legal drugs such as alcohol and tobacco. Until then, we have no chance of developing a rational drug policy.”

Consider yourself educated.

Next time someone brings up the “hard” drugs like ecstasy, perhaps you can pass on the light of knowledge to him. Who knows? Maybe by the time I’m 50 we'll unwad our collective Puritanism Panties and legalize the imminently safe drug, MDMA.

“I feel twitterers around me, r there any twitterers wit me, say somethin.”

2009-02-20T15:05:00.001-07:00

This story was so fantastic in its Sports-Celebrity-Interaction*, it drove me to twitter (Peep the right side of the blog for my last 5 tweets). If you follow me, I’ll follow you…

As if I needed an excuse to post a heapin’ spoonful of awesome:

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*Seriously, how cool would it be to just waltz into the diner and see Kazaam/Shaq-Fu sittin’ in the corner booth, twitterin’ away? If that happens to me with Mike Hart or Larry Bird, you’re gonna get a twitter of basically “OMGOMG!@#*$*!MikeHartsHere!!!AAAAAAAAH!”

Friday Schmaltz

2009-02-20T13:37:00.001-07:00

This kind of story, written by anyone besides Tiny Bouffant’d Midget, is guaranteed to get me all verklempt and I’m-fine-no-really-its-nothing-I-just-got-a-piece-of-popcorn-in-my-eye.

Radley Balko Finds The Truth. The Ugly, Ugly Truth.

2009-02-19T14:48:00.001-07:00

Radley Balko, yeoman truth-searcher, has a new feature piece at Reason. WARNING: NO SERIOUSLY, WARNING: it’s some horrifying stuff.

In the piece, Balko releases a video clip from an autopsy examination of a 23 month old drowning victim. The forensic doctors in charge of the autopsy, Michael West and Stephen Hayne, have long been considered corrupt and lousy experts. Of course, that doesn’t stop the police from using Hayne and West’s testimony in thousands of court cases each year.

Anyway, Balko investigated a case the two scientists handled back in 1993, where their testimony put a man, Jimmy Duncan, on death row. Hayne and West filmed their examination of the little girl, but then the defense lawyers grabbed a copy. What did they see?

The video shows bite marks mysteriously appearing on the toddler's face during the time she was in the custody of Hayne and West. It then shows West repeatedly and methodically pressing and scraping a dental mold of a man's teeth on the dead girl's skin. Forensic scientists who have viewed the footage say the video reveals not only medical malpractice, but criminal evidence tampering.

BAM! INNOCENT MAN FOUND GUILTY AT TRIAL BASED ON “EXPERT TESTIMONY”! THERE’S SOME QUICK LOOZIANA JUSTICE FER YA!

I’m writing in faux/snarky hysterics because I think if I actually take the time to think about this case, I’ll get so angry that I’ll lose control of my body and do something I regret. Like drink a whole bottle of moonshine in a single setting, or go throw rocks at squirrels. This is disgusting.

For those who don’t quite see all the fuss, allow me to lay out what happened: Hayne (the chief forensics expert), would get a hint that the police wanted the autopsy to point in a certain direction. He would then discover “possible bite marks” on the body that other experts hadn’t noticed in their own examinations. This, of course, means that the police are required to take dental molds of suspects teeth. Hayne brings in his expert on teeth, West, and the two of them would use the freshly-acquired molds to physically desecrate the corpse and make the necessary marks on the victim. Their subsequent testimony re: the bite marks would oftentimes be sufficient for a guilty verdict.

Don’t get it twisted: if Jimmy Duncan had been executed for this crime (he’s still on death row), Hayne and West would have been murderers, straight up.

Some say that “The State has the right to execute guilty criminals.” Perhaps so. I tend to think not, but whatevs. But even if one is granted this claim, though, the claim does not allow for the State to have “the right to execute every convicted criminal and a few extra innocent citizens on the side in order to make sure the we get all the bad guys.” The hoary truism about “better 100 guilty men go free than 1 innocent man be in prison” is still a true and good value for society, despite its hoariness. Therefore, if the veracity of the word “guilty” in our initial statement is at all in question, the State’s according power should be just as much in doubt. This awful story is proof enough that empowering the State and her bureaucrats to execute convicted criminals is a foolhardy and dangerous position. One is placing far more trust in the competency of the State to determine guilt than the evidence warrants.

Read The Whole Thing Only If You Want To Learn The Truth But Become Really Really Angry. WARNING AGAIN, THO: GRAPHIC AND DISTURBING VIDEO.

If Anyone In Europe Would Know What a Totalitarian Government Looks Like…

2009-02-19T13:53:00.001-07:00

it would be the Czechs.

Someone, Please -- Hire This Man. Immediately

2009-02-19T12:15:00.001-07:00

I Doubt Biff Henderson Makes That Kind of Money

2009-02-19T12:11:00.001-07:00

I know this might be news to some (namely parents who haven’t given much thought to the makeup of academia), but the story that Well-Fed Academics Are Cozy With Democrats might be the new “Sun Rises In The East” news story. I mean, does anyone doubt the fact that “educator” class is firmly entrenched on The Left? Yaaawn.

It is worth noting, however, that John Holdren, who is the director of the White House’s Office of Science and Technology Policy, was paid $250 to speak about climate change… by the Late Show with David Letterman? Huh?

Two Column Fists In the Freedom Fight

2009-02-19T11:59:00.001-07:00

Yeesh, I don’t like that post title.

My rhetorical-fight analogies are waning. Pretty soon I’ll begin naming newspaper columns and blog posts after boxers (like I’ve named my own fists*):

- George Will has a bangin’ column highlighting the efforts of some newspapers looking for a bailout. A Philadelphia publisher insists that, even if it means that the State would own the “free press”, the bailout is needed for the truck drivers and printing press operators. Gawd. /dinosaurindustry

- Paul Ingrassia, former Detroit bureau chief for the Wall Street Journal, crushes the auto executives, bashes the unions, and ridicules Social Security, all in the span of 1250 words. I think I’m in love.

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*For those who would care to know, my left hand is named Les Darcy and my right is John Mugabi.

More Cause-N-Effect

2009-02-18T13:53:00.001-07:00

When a federal government passes a stimulus bill that weighs over 866,000 tons in actual weight (davefoulk’s got his numbers wrong), you get this kind of heartening reaction:

“… the 81st Legislature of the State of Texas hereby claim sovereignty under the Tenth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States…

…RESOLVED, That this serve as notice and demand to the federal government, as our agent, to cease and desist, effective immediately, mandates that are beyond the scope of these constitutionally delegated powers.”

The sovereignty roll swells larger by the day. For those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about, here’s a good place to start.

Signs from the Stimulus Protest at the Denver Museum

2009-02-17T15:41:00.001-07:00

So I went to the Denver Museum of Nature & Science to protest President Obama’s signing of the $787b state-stimulus bill. There was a crowd of about 70 standing outside the museum entrance, about 15 of them there in protest.

I thought I’d take the Clever Cake for my sign:

(All credit and inspiration go to Ted Balaker at Reason.)

But I’m afraid I claimed the bronze, at best. Silver goes to:

(That’s a bag of pork rinds on the Bill’s right.)

And the gold? To a blissful combination of vice and satire:

That’s how we do it in Colorado: voice our discontent with style.

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UPDATE: I just got this picture sent from my brother, who showed up with me at the museum:

I’ll zoom in on the back seat for ya:

Yeah, we gots ourselves a wave from the Chief Stimulator!

I Wish I Didn’t Get This

2009-02-15T16:51:00.001-07:00

(H/T: the Murder Burger)

That #1 Spot

2009-02-14T12:52:00.001-07:00

Every once in a while I realize how frickin’ lucky I’ve been in terms of Where I Live. I’ve lived in a lot of widely-recognized wonderful spots: Colorado Springs, Malibu, Princeton, etc. It’s an awesome streak, really.

Well, add another to the win list: Ann Arbor is the number one college sports town.

Just typing this I had an epiphany: maybe I’m the reason why these places are totally cool and desirable. I’m a “Cool Boost” supplement for a city’s Jamba Juice.

Boring-ass cities: I’m available for hire! I see you lookin’ at me Cincinnati! Holla at ya boy, Provo!

Saturday Fun

2009-02-14T12:32:00.001-07:00

Serious stuff later, but here’s a wonderful commercial:

Sorry guys, my parents just died a couple of hours ago.

Who wouldn’t want to go to that party?

You Can’t Fight It

2009-02-13T14:33:00.001-07:00

The early leader for best headline: Anarchist Hangout Surrendering to Market Forces.

/capitalismlolz

There is no god but Bill Watterson, and Calvin is his prophet.

2009-02-13T13:15:00.001-07:00

(click on it for larger size)

Give it a second! It’s going to space!

2009-02-13T13:09:00.001-07:00

A propos my optimistic note earlier this week, Louis C.K., comedy god, had a great rant last night on Conan.

(H/T: barefoot meg)

Obama High School

2009-02-12T12:50:00.001-07:00

This is my city. Overheated progressivism is what. we. do.

Watch the movies though, if only for the reax shots from other Boulder students that basically say: “Uh, no. Look, I’m not against naming the school after a Democrat president, y’all, but maybe we should be sure that he’s gonna turn out okay before we start chiseling the sign? I mean, Warren G. Harding was a popular and handsome man, and look how that turned out.”

Sweet Are the Mexican MNT’s Tears

2009-02-11T21:19:00.001-07:00

Suck it, Mexico.

And some highlights (including some typical Mexican thuggery earning the red card, natch):

It’s good to be the king, bay-bee!

A Non-Sarcastic Optimistic Note

2009-02-11T14:38:00.001-07:00

In contrast to my early-week doldrums, today I’m feeling a little Hump-Day Hope!

Allow me to toss the info your way, and maybe it’ll do the same for you:

Brad DeLong, econ prof at UC-Berkeley, wrote a stunning column for The Week. Besides having one of the worst bio-photos in a paper EVAR, DeLong has some great perspective:

- Adam Smith’s The Wealth of Nations went on sale in 1776 for 1.8 pounds sterling when the average annual income was 30 pounds. So a family could buy roughly 17 copies of the book on their yearly income. Today, a family could buy 6,000 copies. So at least in the sense of book-buying, we’ve multiplied our resources 350 fold.

- DeLong:

Today, buttermilk-fried petrale sole with pickled vegetables and parsley mayonnaise, served at Chez Panisse Café, costs the same share of a day-laborer's earnings as the raw ingredients for two big bowls of oatmeal did in the 18th Century.

- While only emperors could afford to hear symphonies-on-demand in the 18th-century, today you could by a world-class recording of his work for $17.99 on Amazon.

- 1776: 50% of income spent on food. Today: 20%.

DeLong ends with the statement that mankind will, contra optimists of the early 20th century, never learn to be leisurely and enjoy what it has earned. We’ll always find ways to spend our increasing incomes in increasingly large ways. It reminds me of that “law” by some economist, roughly stated: Mankind will continue to have improved living conditions while continually feeling worse off.

The second piece, less academic in nature, is this page from Women’s Day. From the 50’s onward, they have some inflation-adjusted numbers of basic household and woman-related costs. Again, vast improvements are made over time in nearly every category: annual income for single mothers, representation of women in the workforce, amount of house. The only ways it’s declined is in the amount of meat being consumed and the television usage has rocketed. But both of those declines are decisions made from luxury rather than want.

Also, in the WD piece, notice how resolutely unbelieving some of the commenters are. They’re peeved that someone would adjust things to inflation (gasp!). Things aren’t supposed to be getting better! Bushitler and Reagan put us both back DECADES! Your facts are ruining the NARRATIVE!

To such people, I quote thee:

“When someone hides something behind a bush and looks for it again in the same place and finds it there as well, there is not much to praise in such seeking and finding.”

Food N’ Sex

2009-02-11T13:30:00.001-07:00

This is a great piece from Mary Eberstadt at the Hoover Institution’s Policy Review.

It’s a longish one, probably best-suited for a post-dinner glass of wine and a laptop in the living room. Brief summary, however: Eberstadt explores the shifting moral values of the West as they are related to the realms of food and sex. She posits that there has been a reversal between the two. In the 50’s food was a laissez-faire thing (can anyone say Meat Cook Book?) while attitudes on sex were enforced with a relatively strict society. Today, in contrast, sex has become anything-goes, while food is full of self-righteousness and sanctimony.

It reminded me of Dan Savage’s Skipping Toward Gomorrah (a fascinating read, btw), where he was able to find groups that celebrated every one of the Seven Deadly Sins. 6 were quite easy, but finding a group that celebrated Gluttony proved nearly impossible. The closest he approximated was “fat acceptance” groups, which aren’t exactly the same as pro-gluttony, but did the trick for Savage’s purposes.

Furthermore, the only time one hears the word “sinful” being used in modern society is where? That’s right: eating. Al Gore forbid you call a co-worker’s tryst with the secretary a foible, but go right ahead and whip up that batch of freshly made Absolutely Sinful Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cookies.

Like I said: fascinating stuff.

This Is Why I’m A Vegetarian

2009-02-11T12:11:00.001-07:00

Right heeyah.

Not a single thing is appetizin’ on the whole site.

Profiles in Condescending Stereotypes

2009-02-10T17:13:00.001-07:00

I’m still feelin’ crummy enough that my constitution was barely up for watching this:

RTWT. (HT: Hot Air)

This clip shows more about the bigoted stereotyping of the South by the Left than anything else. (not for the first time, either)

It just too easy: move out of the South and engage in the de rigueur denigration: “All my friends and family from (insert southern town here) were prejudiced; I’m a ‘refugee from intolerance’, etc.” After a few shared condescending laughs at the Twanging Christianists, you are welcomed into the “aware” elite of College Town Literati.

It’s also the most arrant kind of crap that passes for thought in such circles. Hell, I think it’s ridiculous, and I consider myself a South-hater.

“Really?” you ask. Yup. I’m at a point in my life where it’s nigh impossible for me to hate the South more. Why?

Two reasons: the SEC and country music. Any region that can prop up The Most Obnoxious People On The Planet AND The Country Bee-Gees* gets a double shot of Wrath De Snowden.

But even in the depth of my lick-spittled rage at the South, I’m smart enough, traveled enough, and, dare I say, mature enough to stop calling everything south of Washington, D.C. “Racist Jesusland”.

Lookit: I know how easy it is to turn to your life partner on the Zola Stella Sofa (of course its sustainable) and say:

“Thank GAWD, Eloise, that Bill Moyers was able to escape that racist-fascist hellhole of the South when he did! They probably still lynch people in some parts. I heard that there were thousands of anti-Muslim attacks in the week after 9/11, and that was just in Mississippi! I just shudder to think what would’ve happened to a progressive man like our PBS host if he had stayed in those backwaters.

By the way, did you hear that Caroline, Allen and Ellen’s daughter, got into Duke, but instead to chose Wellesley? She told me last week that she just couldn’t reconcile her values with a predominantly white and “rural” area like North Carolina. GAWD they raised her well, didn’t they?

Aw, shoot, did we miss Rachel Maddow? She’s soooo smart! Unlike those ditzy bimbos on Fox! Oh, it’s just starting? Great! Get the Snuggies and that organic wine I bought!”

But just because your view of the South is defined by My Cousin Vinny, Defiance, R.E.M., and Ira Glass doesn’t qualify you to label the South any more than my knowledge of Mighty Ducks lets me talk about Minnesota. Grow some perspective.

To echo the countless other commentators out there: I’d much, much, much rather be a Muslim in The Deep South than, say, a Prop 8 supporter in Hollywood or a Marine in Berkeley, or a conservative speaker on a college campus.

----

*As if I couldn’t hate those talentless assclowns more, I go to their Wikipedia page to find out that they are from Columbus, OH. Double Stuft Hate! Mmm, the sweet taste of utter loathing lingers on my lips…

Freedom Steel In The Time of Chaos: Or, Why Liberty Is Important Even When The State Spends $2 Trilli In 5 Months.

2009-02-09T16:32:00.001-07:00

I’m pretty doggone sick today. A serious case of the snuffles and mubblefubbles.

How sick, you ask? So sick as to think that the word “doggone” is acceptable in polite blogospheres.

Anyway, I don’t know if it’s the medication on my brain, or if it’s the bombardment of “stimulus” and “TARP” and “crisis” and “credit infusion”, but I have a bleak view of the roads ahead. I’m pretty pessimistic about the future, about my chance to freely earn my own living and live in liberty. Doesn’t look like it’s going to be happening in my life time, and none of my parents’ generation seems to care. Sorta disillusionin’, to be perfectly honest.

Well, when I find myself in times of trouble, Grampa Milty comes to me…

Here’s Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4.

It’s a bracing watch, and it’s a great enhearkenment* to the gospel of liberty. His political/economic theory (espoused in the Yubes videos above) is as close to my own views as I’ve found on the internet.

So, in closing my disease-addled rant…

*Feebly raises pasty, sweaty head from pillow, stares hauntingly straight through the Steadicam 8 inches in front of his face*

<cough, hack up spittle, cough>

ME: As long as someone knows the truth, as long as you out there heed the words of Milton The Resolute, as long as my corpse is plastinated and screwed into a Section 23 seat at Michigan Stadium, THEN I shall not have lived in vain!!! LIVE TO MAKE GRAMPA MILTY PROUD!!!

<death rattle/Hokey Pokey of the Alveoli, I see the end and she’s coming quickly.>

*Collapses back into thin reed pillow provided by kindly Côn Sơn Island prison guard.*

[cut to black]

----

*I know I made it up, but it should sooooo be a word. W000 WORD-MAKIN ON TUSSIN!

Gods Of Politics, Satire, and Celebrity Self-Puffery! Hear My Prayer!

2009-02-06T17:42:00.001-07:00

Make this so.

I looove me some Photoshop.

Bringing Reality to the Table

2009-02-06T14:22:00.001-07:00

Jim Manzi, on a fool’s errand to bring cold hard facts to the discussion on the stimulus. It’s a great idea that will, of course, never be implemented. The Emperor likes his nudity…

A Long Thought or Two About Geert Wilders and Islam

2009-02-06T12:46:00.001-07:00

I just wrote a loooong email response to my father regarding this speech by Geert Wilders. I’m thinking, I guess, that if I put so much effort into writing it for him, why not share it with the world?

Take it or leave it, here ya go:

Dad,

I have a lot of thoughts on this speech, but rather than spew them all out in an undisciplined cloud, I'll try and phrase them succinctly and and in bullet question-form:

- He's right on the growth of Islam. Here's a good (if a bit anodyne) overview of the current number of Muslims in Europe from the BBC. But to ask my first question: does Wilders have any way to prove what percentage of these Muslims are devout and what percentage are merely cultural? By my lights, cultural Muslims (a la Steven Spielburg to Judaism) aren't detrimental to a Western liberal democracy. Rather than deal in broad numbers, Wilders would be better suited to discuss statistics that deal with specific policies (like support for suicide bombing, for example) than with religious/cultural identifiers like "Islam".

- Wilders does steal an intellectual base or two with blanket statements. Perhaps its because it's in a speech, but he seems to simply assert that there are secret plans to build "super-mosques" with absolutly no evidence. I'd like more than just buzz terms if we are going to analyze this properly.

- Wilders also loses some credibility in my book when he generalizes news stories (which I know in detail) to make a rhetorical point. To wit: sharia courts, while "part" of the legal system of the UK, aren't the same sharia courts we see in Saudi Arabia or Egypt. There are no beheadings or stonings to speak of. Please don't misunderstand: I find the mere existence of sharia courts in England revolting to my instincts, but no one is well served by overheated generalities.

- To a broader point, I also think Wilders makes a mistake by taking on Islam as a whole. While I'm not equivocating, the same critiques Geert makes of Islam could be made of Christianity. The Scriptures are quite clear that God does not desire a "moderate Christianity", just as the Koran commands Muslims. Every word in the Bible is God's and not open to interpretation, as the Koran is Allah's word. The list could go on. I'm not suggesting that Christianity is as violent as Islam, but I am stating that Christianity also has its own illiberal tendencies, if viewed through the right lens. Christians, through Providence and reason, however, progressed: there are few Christians who advocate slavery or suggest stoning unruly children. Few Christians believe that polygamy is acceptable.

Islam, to me, suffers more from a Petri-dish-style isolation problem than from a dogmatic interpretation problem. It's been a religion in a region that tolerates few (if any) challengers. There have been elements of progress in the past: the late 19th/early 20th century brought much change to the Middle East, and it showed in the moderation of theology and modernization of culture. The second half of the 20th century, however, brought a lot of Marxist-born ethnic/religious-identity theory to the region, regressing to a time 150 years in the past. This noxious filth must be excised from the world, without a doubt. But to pin the problems of the past 30 years on the core of a religion, a religion that managed to be at peace with the West for hundreds of years, is a bit short sighted.

Islam must be competed with, not eradicated.

- I'll close by attempting a summary: My quibbles with Wilders are far outstripped by my agreements. I guess where I differ from Wilders and (perhaps) the sender of this email, is that I've already chalked Europe into the "Lost" column. It's sounds harsh, but the sentiment is not one of haste.

Here's how I calculate it: the answer to illiberalism is a confident liberalism (I'm using it in the classic sense here). Fundamentalist Islam is an illiberal force that will expand until it is confronted. Fundamentalist Islam is covering Europe. Europe lacks the requisite cultural confidence in its liberalism. Therefore, Fundamentalist Islam will cover Europe. It's a longwinded syllogism, but it seems airtight.

For America, the prescription is equally simple: be confident in who we are. Don't apologize for finding burqas abominable. Speak out against "honor crimes" whereever they are. Refuse to accept that hanging homosexuals (as takes place in Iran) as the norm. When you read about genital mutilation for women in Muslim countries, don't tell yourself that "it's just a different world over there." Demand progress from the Middle East and SE Asia, and don't let up until the change happens.

That doesn't mean we have to colonize every country or fight every imam in power. It does mean, however, that we must be ever-vigilant of our own proceedings. If our money is involved, if our political/military support is essential, we should demand that our values are just as involved, just as essential.

Thanks Dad for forwarding this, I'd love to hear your thoughts as well,

-----

Same goes for you out there, readers. I’d love to hear your emails/comments too.

Some more posterizin!

2009-02-05T13:06:00.001-07:00

Welcome back, dear old friend!*

We’ve missed you so!

Checking out the campaign’s Ethics page, it’s actually quite laughable how quickly he’s moved on to the usual governmental problems.

It’s not laughable that President Obama has corruption in his administration: both parties have it in loads. What’s laughable is that so many people believed it would be different.

---

* Everything else aside, the President has my undying gratitude for continuing to maintain the “_____ We Can Believe In” site. It’s almost like a Orffyreus Wheel of Comedy.

Snark O’ The Day

2009-02-04T14:03:00.001-07:00

McCardle vs. Wall Street Executives.

Journalist 1, Corporate Compensation Policy 0.

A Sane Look at BHM

2009-02-04T13:56:00.001-07:00

I’m a few days late to the beginning of Black History Month, but I feel it’s my civic duty to direct y’all to Ta-Nehisi Coates.

“I think people who want to get rid of Black History Month are only slightly less annoying than people who complain about Kwanzaa. Yes, it's true--Bob Johnson and Michael Jordan weren't what Carter G. Woodson had in mind. But the true mark of a movement's success is its descent into hackery.”

Consider myself a hearty co-signer onto the piece.

TNC is one of the best bloggers out there, coming strong with opinions on a seemingly hourly basis. I often disagree with the man, but his takes are solid. If we could swap him out for Al Sharpton and Roland Martin as Voice of All Blackdom, cable news would be a better place.

The best part though? TNC would refuse the position, since he’s bold enough to think that the Black community is far too multifaceted and nuanced as to have a “voice”.

And that’s why he’s great.

Ojibwe, Language of Champions

2009-02-04T13:42:00.001-07:00

Yeah, this is great:

You’re seeing about half of the wonderful student-athletes of the Michigan football team showing off their Ojibwe language skills. Highlights:

- The Rodriguez family awkwardly participating in a player’s class project (@ about 10 seconds in)

- Mike Barwis taking to the American Indian language like a fish to water (@ about 2:45)

- Steve Three dorking it up throughout.

Truly, the greatest collaboration between My People and America’s Pastime since this.

“…if you started the day Jesus Christ was born and spent $1 million every day since then, you still wouldn’t have spent $1 trillion.”

2009-02-04T12:05:00.001-07:00

Or even $819 billion, the amount proposed in the House’s stimulus package.

I can’t be alone in sayin’ that I probably won’t pay this.

I’ll set up shop in Turks and Caicos. I’ll become my own corporation in the Bahamas. I’ll move to Uruguay, Hong Kong, or my dear Czech Republic.

My loyalty is to freedom and liberty first, my nation second.

A Just Question: What Would The Founding Fathers Think?

2009-02-03T12:28:00.001-07:00

“Unlike any government before or since, ours was founded on the supremacy of the individual over the collective. The Founders understood full well that harmony and security might suffer when every man (it would be many terrible years until that word would be understood to mean every human) was the king of his castle. These men weren't naive; they were serious radicals. [Emphasis added –S.] And they knew that living out a radical belief in freedom would require courage and sacrifice.”

Preach, Brother Shroder, preach.

Four-Legged Victims of the War on Drugs

2009-02-03T12:11:00.001-07:00

I meant to post this yesterday, but everyone should read this fantastic feature in the Washington Post Magazine. Forward it on to anyone you know who is still agnostic or ambivalent on the drug war, especially to any dog lovers you know.

I think so many people, especially conservative and right-leaning individuals, presume a level of efficiency and competency on the part of our law enforcement that they deny our bureaucrats running Departments of Education, HUD, Transportation or Commerce. Were it not so. Whether you view it as an unfortunate reality or as another reason to abolish most forms of government, the War on Drugs has had an undeniably enormous effect on the size of law enforcement, the massive growth of “criminals” on our streets (and subsequent sociological fallout from time spent in prison), and the growth of the prison industry in the United States. This litany of government failure would be paraded around by the Right if it were public school teachers’ salaries, NEA grants, and “eco-friendly” boondoggles.

Is the level of government ineptitude tolerable in the War on Drugs? That’s up to each person to decide for himself. I think a fair-minded review of the facts, however, points toward this government effort being an intolerable evil foisted upon a dubious public.

The Thought Police v. King of the Jazz Critics

2009-02-02T17:03:00.001-07:00

Nat Hentoff, the Godfather of jazz writing, speaks:

“…When the riots and deaths following those Danish cartoons were reported in American newspapers, none of the offending cartoons was published accompanying the stories in major dailies, except the Philadelphia Inquirer and the New York Sun. But I ran the story at the Village Voice, where I then had a column, with the cartoon of Prophet Muhammad wearing the bomb-shaped turban.

I was damned if I'd be intimidated for doing my job as a reporter…”

Note: Hentoff’s also a fearless civil libertarian (probably no coincidence that the Fulbright Fellow who is the preeminent critic of America’s freest musical expression supports freedom of expression in other areas).

A personal note: when I was on the editorial board at The Michigan Review, I think I was the only person who militantly stood for publishing the Danish cartoons in our own paper. I viewed it as a moment of free-speech-solidarity, but I got voted down. After reading Hentoff’s piece, I’m even more confident that we should’ve run the cartoons.

I’ll throw one up right here, since I’m in such a free-speech mood:

Ain’t no shame or hiding in these quarters.

YouTube, A Better Cop Than the Cops?

2009-02-02T16:36:00.001-07:00

It seems that whenever I start feeling that I should be cutting the police a break, that the majority of law enforcement are very humble social servants, a clip like this pops up on YouTube and I’m reminded of what I’ve read and seen, both in realistic fiction (The Wire) and real life (Oscar Grant, Malice Green or just a usual day on Radley’s blog).

Maybe some of the men and women who comprise our law-enforcement are decent liberty-minded citizens eager to protect the innocent. Heck, the majority of them might be good people.

It doesn’t change the fact that we’ve given faaaar too much power to a group that is far too fallible.

Peyton Manning Wishes Friedrich Hayek Was NFL Commish

2009-01-29T14:17:00.001-07:00

It’s rare that a written piece is so cogent and yet different that it causes me to involuntarily smile. I don’t know why I do it, but when I’m confronted with an absolutely elegant strain of thinking, I’m like a little kid learning how something works: giggles abound.

Peep this awesome article from Slate.

The author muses over alternatives to the coin flip to determine possession at the beginning of overtime in the NFL. Right now, it’s a capricious system. It’s literally determined by random chance. In the first round of the playoffs this year, San Diego won the coin toss, received the ball, and promptly went down the field, scored, and left. Their opponent, Indianapolis, was left there, mouth agape, looking like Ryan Seacrest speechless during the American Idol auditions.

There must be a better way.

Well, whadya know it, when you treat it like a market and allow for auctioning, you get a more competitive and more entertaining arrangement!

An even more elegant solution to the overtime problem was proposed in 2002 by Chris Quanbeck, an electrical engineer (and Green Bay Packers fan). Quanbeck's idea was to auction off possession of the ball in the natural currency of the game: field position. The team that was willing to begin closest to its own goal line would receive the privilege of possession.

How cool would that be?

I hope you said “very cool”, because that’s the correct answer.

All joking pseudoconversations aside, I think it’s a nice little illustration of a basic capitalist principle: when you establish an open and free arena with known rules, individuals will be better allocators of scarce resources than third parties.

Wow, two sports posts in one day.

Greatest Friend, Worst Enemy

2009-01-29T12:41:00.001-07:00

Sweet Jebus, this man is tough as nails. Really, really, tough nails.

HT: Ricks and Yon*

---

*Good name for a folkish pop band.

Someone At State Dept. Is Inhuman

2009-01-29T12:04:00.001-07:00

For being the “Party For The Poor” and enjoying the props of 96% of black voters, Obama and the Dems really stabbed about 96% of the world’s poor black people in the back this week by replacing Dr. Mark Dybul at the PEPFAR position.

Dybul is almost single-handedly responsible for driving GWB’s only consistent success through his two terms: AIDS relief to Africa.

Note that the repressive theocrat Bush apparently missed that Dybul was an openly gay Democrat. I mean, if GWB’d known, he’d have called James Dobson and Tim LaHaye for advice, gone to pray with Rick Warren, then fired Dybul. Right?

Anyway, Dybul put millions of Africans on AIDS medication, distributed billions of condoms, and supported religious-based sex education from the non-profits and churches in Africa. He ran the group that allowed nearly a quarter of a million children to be born HIV-free. He helped prevent transmission of HIV from mother-to-fetus in 16 million more.

There’s the problem. What, you missed it?

HOW COULD YOU MISS “RELIGIOUS”?!! DON’T YOU KNOW THAT MEANS DYBUL WAS OKAY WITH ABSTINENCE EDUCATION!!1! HE’S A THEOCRAT!*

But what about all the con--

KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY BODY, CHRISTIANIST!

Don’t you think that abstinence makes a little bit of sen--

I MEAN IT!! DON’T TREAD ON MY RIGHTS!

---

*Best if read in an angry female-version of Loud Howard.

Early Morning Thoughts of a Sports Junkie

2009-01-29T10:03:00.001-07:00

Last night was awesome.

Every day, nba.com has the “Daily Leaders” for each statistical category for the games the night before.

This morning, Kevin Durant was the leader for points (35), David Lee the leader for rebounds (16), and Jose Calderon was the leader for assists (11).

All three are on my fantasy team.

An Introduction

2009-01-28T13:07:00.001-07:00

World, meet Dhani.

Dhani, World.

If I had Tivo, this would be the only thing on it.

This, and Weeds.

This, Weeds, and 30 Rock.

Let me start over: If I had a Tivo, it would have Weeds, 30 Rock, South Park, and Dhani Tackles The World on it.

Also:Is this, possibly, the greatest gift from UM to the world ever?

Throwdown: God vs. Flying Spaghetti Monster

2009-01-28T12:19:00.001-07:00

Allow me to make amends and post some photos:

For the benighted and huddled masses, from L to R we have: Christopher Hitchens, Atheist Extraordinaire; Dan Caplis, Moderator, and, umm, Radio Host Ordinaire?; and Dinesh D’Souza, Catholic-Con Ninja.

Kevin Jones at Philokalia Republic has an extensive and thoughtfully-critiqued recount of the debate here. He obviously comes from the Catholic side, but he’s got some good classical philosophy points in there.

My thoughts? Well, I’m a sucker for zing-worthy rhetoric, so that (in car salesman speak) prequalifies me for head of the Hitchens Fan Club- Boulder Diaspora.

That does not mean I thought the Brit the winner. I don’t think there was one. I feel strongly that it’s impossible to argue someone in to or out of a religious faith. The mind often hears what it wants, and no more so than in the case of transcendent or spiritual affairs. So even if you have a devastatingly clever point or theory, one that I might even concede as correct, the actual act of faith, doubt, or agnosticism is unreachable to that freshly-spanked-eager-to-change intellect. One can never predict what is the word, act, or image that finally sends himself to or away from a religion.

That being said, D’Souza had some good points as well. The only quibble I had with either person, however, was with D’Souza. In his closing remarks, he made the accusation to Hitchens (and by proxy to all nonbelievers) that he clung to atheism, not out of his need for evidence, but because the atheist is fundamentally uncomfortable with the prospect of a judging God. In other words, atheists claim “there is no God” because they don’t want Jehovah/Allah/Yahweh/Vishnu cramping their style.

That’s a pretty harsh and condescending tone for D’Souza to take, IMO, and I don’t think that broad attacks on what amount to individuals’ own thoughts suit either side. A little more moral empathy and humility would have become Mr. D’Souza, especially considering the camp he was charged to defend.

Besides that line, I greatly enjoyed the entire 3 hours. One of the perks of livin’ in a college town…

P.S. I did, true to my word, ask if Hitch or D-Sooz were interested in continuing the debate afterwards over a few pints. Hitchens responded that he’d most definitely be in a bar after the debate, but he later told me that he’d be heading back to Denver that night. No dice.

So close…

My Hero Comes To Town

2009-01-26T17:42:00.001-07:00

I’m off to see My Boy face off against Dinesh D’Souza in a debate titled “What’s So Great About God? Atheism vs. Religion” here in Boulder.

Hopefully I’ll have pictures/video and notes from the event to relay on. I’m also going to, in all seriousness, try and invite Hitch to join my team for our weekly Pub Quiz at Conor O’Neil’s tonight. He’s smart, he likes to drink: he’s perfect for our team. (Team name: Scooty Puff, Jr.!)

More on the Oscar Grant murder

2009-01-26T13:46:00.001-07:00

It looks like a second officer is being investigated by the District Attorney for “allegedly using excessive force”.

My guess, to start off, is that Mehserle (the officer who has been charged with second-degree murder for shooting a restrained man in the back) will face the brunt of the legal punishment, and this second unnamed officer will plead to lesser charges (that allow him to stay on the force) in exchange for testimony in Mehserle’s trial. That’ll probably mean that this jerk gets to keep his job on the force. Naturally.

I can’t help shaking the feeling that everyone involved would have been off the hook for any problems if Grant had just had an ounce of weed in his pocket. We all know how that would’ve been spun: Officer Forced to Shoot Drug Dealer. Does it matter that he was being held down by another officer? No, because drug dealers deserve it.

My right eye’s already twitching. Not a good way to start my week.

Drug War Debate

2009-01-22T10:04:00.001-07:00

You won’t find a better anti-Drug War warrior than Radley Balko. To wit, peep this article at Culture11. It’s cogent, level-headed, and devastating.

Furthermore, the emptiness of the opposing side’s position is evinced by the really shabby retort from David Freddoso. I think David’s a good writer, and I’ve enjoyed his stuff on The Corner, but the piece is terrible. It’s not his fault: he’s got nothing to work with.

Obaman-Canadian-Hip-Hop, The Mixtape

2009-01-21T12:21:00.001-07:00

I’m pretty proud I’m on the ground floor for this guy:

That’s just awesome. It’s almost Darrell Hammond in it’s perfection. It also reminds me how much President Obama sounds like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson in his wrestling days.

One more for the road:

The man deserves all the recognition he can get. All’s I got at the moment, however, is a YouTube profile. Feraztheman, give us more info, so we can gets about hypin’ your stuff.

In the spirit of these heady times, allow me, a hip-hop lover, a modest dream of my own: this man and our president on the same stage, rockin’ Pass The Breaks.

On the other hand, if I could trust the President to have a solid flow, I’d vote for Get the Bozack. The leader of the free world sayin’

“I come correct with the context, and then next
then flex and throw a hex on your whole complex”

would cause your fearless correspondent to lose his mind.

(HT: Joey at Straight Bangin’, yet again for keepin’ an ear on the ground for his readers.)

Trust Us, Though, We’ll Get The Budget Right

2009-01-20T15:06:00.001-07:00

Through Megan McCardle’s post, I clicked through to the Office of Management and Budget’s new site. What did I spy, however?

Aaand, zooming in:

Good grief, we’re hours in to one of the most highly anticipated political transitions in U.S. history, and the president’s first name is mistyped? I know the kinks will be de-kinked out, but it doesn’t inspire confidence.

But we can surely trust these guys with a nearly half-trillion dollar deficit, right?

I Love Ya Wolfie, But Let Anderson Do The Talking

2009-01-20T09:01:00.002-07:00

Wolf Blitzer is really screwing it up today on the inauguration stuff. He's had at least 12 screw ups in the last 45 minutes, including, with the president and the president-elect on screen, identifying them as "President Bush and Joe Biden." Yikes. This probably means that he's just really terrible at live, improvisational hosting.

But still.

MLK Jr.: Moral Clarity On Marching

2009-01-19T10:38:00.001-07:00

I don’t know if it’s a product of my education or my own anti-statist bent, but I’ve often had sympathetic positions with marchers – the placard-holding chanting types. Why? I don’t know for sure. If I could pin it down, however, my guess would be that, since I so dearly cherish the freedom of thought and freedom of expression, I subsequently think warmly of nearly all people who use those freedoms for the pursuit of their goals (uggh, too many “-ly” adverbs in that sentence). Incidentally, I find myself also agreeing with many of the positions taken by protestors and marchers.

Some examples might help:

If you were on the right side of the civil rights debate in the 50’s and 60’s you would be in agreement with the MLK marchers and sit-in protests. If in the early 20th century you felt that women should have the right to vote, you would be marching with the suffragettes. I also can sympathize with the unionizers who faced brutal work conditions and ruthless police-corporate collusion in turn of the last century. Today, a position I find much to agree with is the pro-life movement, and, natch, their side of the debate overwhelmingly has the most rallies and marches.

But there’s another side to all this, at least for me, that needs to be evaluated. I think that on today, a day set aside to celebrate a man who led many marches and protests himself, we should separate wheat from chaff: remember the courage of those in the right, yet also remind ourselves not all marches and protests are done with the ideas of liberty in mind. It might sound like a dumb Profound Statement, especially for those of you who have nothing but scorn for the anti-WTO and convention-protesting types, but I think more inspection of the kinds of protests will promote a clarity that is much needed in our current political environment.

Another illustrative historical example:

In The Battle of Cable Street, thousands of British Fascists, inspired by their pogromming German counterparts, planned a march through the Jewish neighborhoods of London’s East End. What they would do there, no one could say for sure, but it wasn’t too much of a stretch to imagine that there would be intimidation and possible violence against the Jewish inhabitants.

Their march, one of oppression and ethnic bigotry, while popular with some in government, was not without it’s opponents. Irish workers, Communists, and the Jews themselves all stood at the edge of the neighborhoods and refused to let the blackshirts march through. There was a confrontation, but in the end the barricade stood and the fascists were turned away.

(Of course, no conflict between groups can be complete without some broken skulls and mass arrests, brought to you by The State! Now with Extra-Brutal Crowd Control!)

In its retelling, the Battle has taken on a more triumphant tone. What I find worth remembering, however, is that there were thousands of Britons who were willing to march in the streets, in uniform, in support of anti-Semitism. I ask myself: what kind of society allows this to grow to such a level? Why wasn’t anyone against these bastards in the formative years of the British Union of Fascists? I think I’ve found the answer, however: one not very different from our own.

It seems that in the past few weeks we are seeing the resurrection of these blackshirts, and again they are being met with a milquetoast response. The battle between Israel and Gaza seems occasion enough for anti-Semitism to be allowed a place at the table.

Vandals hurled Molotov cocktails at a synagogue in a Paris suburb…

Three other synagogues have been firebombed in the past two weeks…

vandals have sprayed anti-Israeli graffiti on at least two other Jewish places of worship…

"Death to Israel," "Long live Palestine" and "F--k France" scrawled on synagogue wall…

Swastika and ZOG (for Zionist Occupation Government) painted near door of synagogue…

Windows broken, cross sprayed on wall…

During pro-Palestinian march, 200 youths try to march on synagogue…

A car is set on fire in synagogue parking lot…

And that’s just in France.

Look at this photobook from Australia. In it you’ll see marchers carrying Hezbollah and Hamas flags,you’ll see kids holding signs saying that the Jews didn’t learn their lessons from the Nazis well enough the first time (HT: Instapundit). When faced with this, many in the “liberal tradition” from the West choose yet again to merely bend over and let these anti-Semites do whatever they please.

In the past, hate-groups like the KKK were opposed by many people: black, Christian, Jewish, white, Democrats and Republican -- all organized under the principle of anti-racism. Yet where are those today who would unify under an “anti anti-Semitism” banner? Why was it right to protest the “cultural expression” of white supremacists yet wrong to fight against the “cultural expression” of anti-Semitic Arabs?

Let’s use this day of celebration of Dr. King to hone our moral sense, make it sharp enough to impel us to stand up and say “No Pasaran!” to bigotry on all sides*. To do less is to do wrong by the legacy of a great man.

---

*Yes, I recognize that there is anti-Arab bigotry amongst Jews as well. This is no moral equivocating, however: only one side in this debate teaches their children that a) the other side are pigs and b) the murder of said pigs is pleasing to God. And that side sure isn’t the one going to synagogue on Saturday.

Good Analysis on Oscar Grant’s Killer

2009-01-19T09:03:00.001-07:00

Radley Balko offers up some more level-headed advice on the Oscar Grant Story. It’s good stuff, and it’s coming from a guy who is indefatigable in his research on cop brutality, especially when it comes to Drug War related stuff.

I know that my emotions run too high when I talk about the details of the events, so it’s best that I just try and let others do the analyzing.

My Addiction, My Downfall: NPR

2009-01-17T09:43:00.001-07:00

A vision:

After hearing the 1,047th report* about the southern Montana lesbian tofu rancher’s hope for the future (brought about by President Obama), I will quietly turn off my public radio. I’ll rev the 6 cylinders of my Subaru Forester (28 mpg on the highway!) With a clear eye, I’ll stare down the hill, down that dark mountain road. The quiet of ten thousand trees will lean upon me. I know where the road goes: straight off a cliff.

As the trees move by, the roar, or rather chuckle, of my import car’s engine comes up past my depressed gas pedal, up to my addled brain, I steel myself for the silence, that terrible silence that comes after I blast through the guard rail and soar thousands of feet down to the river below. As I accelerate towards my demise, however, I’ll realize:

Snowden, you don’t have to die.

I’ll realize that just because NPR personalities and NPR fans act like they are the only thoughtful and informed people left in this theocratic lynch mob of a nation (“Gawd, Claire, only in America does something like Prop. 8 get passed. And that’s in California! Susan Sarandon and Martin Sheen live there! Pass the pinot grigio, would you, dear? At least we have our raw foods to keep us company here in Chapel Hill!”) doesn’t mean they actually are thoughtful and informed.

Snowden, I’ll tell myself, there are millions of people out there who aren’t insufferable! There are people out there who aren’t merely enjoying the smell of their own farts and telling each other “Good For You!” Go find them! They’re just waiting for you, waiting to talk about current events without injecting their own awesomeness into every part of the conversation!

Faced with prospect of a brighter future, my foot’ll ease off the pedal. I’ll loosen my grip on the steering wheel. More sufferable days are on their way, I’ll tell myself.

But bad habits die hard. Without even thinking, my hand will wander to the radio, turn it on, and the damage is done:

…“Now we hear from NPR Senior Correspondent, Daniel Schorr, who has the next installation in his ongoing series "An Old Eye For a New World”, titled “Black Levied: How George W. Bush Tried To Kill All Black People in New Orleans With The Help Of His Friend And Heretofore Unknown Mentor Rep. Joseph McCarthy.” Daniel?…

AAARGH!!

My Subaru chuckles louder. The void, the blissfully NPR-free void awaits.

FIN.

----------

*It might be the 1046th. I can’t be sure.

A Small Step of Lifehacking for Snowden…

2009-01-16T17:04:00.001-07:00

I’ve made the switch, for publishing purposes, to Windows Live Writer for all my submissions. It won’t mean anything for the appearance of the blog (or at least shouldn’t), but it hopefully will allow me to post even faster and with greater quality.

Trials and Tribulations of Free Speech

2009-01-15T11:23:00.003-07:00

So this story about the new EU sculpture is making its way around the American news spheres. My thoughts are as follows:

Only a Czech would do this. And it's the primary reason why they're the only country in Europe that still holds my interest and my respect.
This controversy does shed light on the un-nuanced, brutish world of the hyper-sensitive "tolerance" movement. Several of sculptures are, to put it simply, open to interpretation. The German piece is clearly overridden with the Autobahn, but some claim to additionally see a hidden swastika in the street pattern. I looked at the Spanish one and saw a cement mixer and a country dominated by construction. Some ever-eager victims-to-be. however, saw a Basque separtist bomb and a destroyed building wall. So, rather than allow each person to experience the art for him/herself, the expression police simply "declare" the art to be the most offensive possibility and demand its repression.
A not insignificant part of what defines (or at least has defined) the West is the ability for this kind of subversive art to be prominently exhibited. When's the last time you saw a Chinese artist lampooning the Politburo's uptight image in a large mural on the side of a Beijing building? Or how about that renowned Yemeni Dadaist performance art culture? The Belarussian anarchist punk rock movement? Nothing?

The point is, if the art comes down because bureaucrats kvetch everyone else into submission, the West will lose part of its identity.

It's also worth noting that the two groups who are telling people to "sit down, stop 'abusing' your freedoms, and listen to us" are: EU thought police, and radical Islam.

The second part of this post is also free-speech related. Let me first disclaim myself by saying that I think the following video is sophomoric, that I have wonderful friends who are followers of Islam, and that I am now and always have been a strong advocate for teddy bears' rights. That being said, I also am now and always have been a strong advocate for free speech. The right to offend is far more important the the right to not be offended:

There's already like 5-10 versions of this "Slaying the Prophet Muhammad" on YouTube, and the number will grow. The guys orchestrating it know how to use Digg, Reddit, JimmyR, etc. They'll make their plans known. They're 4chan. They (as much as they can be a "they") like to be scatalogical and disrespectful. Courting controversy's their "bag, baby." 4chan fought Scientology, and 4chan won. They're doofuses. Whatever. Here's the thing: the fact that these men and women can live unmolested in a free society is not only commendable to the entity we call "The West", but it also indirectly benefits the West as well. Changes always come from people outside a certain camp. If you ban the outside, you lose all mobility, all ability to make positive change.

This video would normally blossom into a big controversy, but my guess is that the MSM is too afraid to even air this kind of stuff for fear of reprisals/Danish Cartoons: Part II.

Washington, D.C.: Too Big To Fail?

2009-01-13T22:38:00.004-07:00

I'm starting to think that the federal government is taking a page out of Bernie Madoff's playbook: spend money gotten from the Ponzi-scheme known as the U.S. Tax Code like a vory v zakone on vacation in the Thailand, and then when you run out of cash or get caught desperately plea bargain to a lesser sentence.

How else can you explain this?

"The White House announced yesterday that it will grant emergency funding to the District to help with soaring costs for the inauguration of President-elect Barack Obama, while forecasters said snow could add to the day's complications...

...The White House statement said that President Bush "declared an emergency exists in the District of Columbia" linked to the inauguration. It said the city would get federal money for protective measures "undertaken to save lives and protect public health and safety."...

... Yesterday was the first time the emergency declaration had been made in advance of a political event, said Scott Stanzel, a White House spokesman..."

Yup, that's right: a bailout for the politicans' hometown soiree.

There's no way that a fully sensible person would green light this expenditure. The nano-thin string connecting our representatives' brains to the national coffers has finally been severed. The culture of the Beltway has rotted so completely that there is apparently no fiscal restraint. At all.

No cause too small, no bill too large, I guess.

I know this might be crazy, D.C., but have you ever thought of requiring a cover charge? You know, something like a $10 per person fee to get into the city for the day? You don't think people would pay that?

I'm shutting down my computer and having a cocktail, before I write something I regret.

Plank, Meet Speck: Geithner before the Senate

2009-01-13T15:40:00.005-07:00

This kind of kabuki theater is one of the most noxious practices in the modern Beltway culture. These senators (some of whom are still in power despite the overwhelming stench of corruption-cologne) get to make a citizen come crawl to them across broken glass, kiss their rings, and "explain" their actions, all so they can claim that they are "representing" the constituencies.

I don't consider myself an Obama supporter*, but requiring a man, any man, to explain why he was lax in prompt payment of a self-employment tax** is repugnant.

How 'bout you explain this, senators:

- Total cost of Tim Geithner's past-due taxes: $34,000.
- Total deficit for the first three months of 2009: $485,000,000,000. (And it's only January 13th!)

If it's an either/or proposition, I'm taking Geithner's "corruption" every time.

--------------
* I'm more of a "Let's Burn Down the Department of Education" supporter.

** When'd we get this tax?! I didn't even know that the state of one's employment was taxeable. Did that get approved in the omnibus bill that authorized a tax on lactose-intolerant carpoolers?

The Bipolar State Department Policy In Israel-Gaza

2009-01-12T12:30:00.004-07:00

However you feel about the current fight in Gaza, it's gotta bug you that America is funding both sides.

What? You hadn't heard?

"How is that possible?" you ask. Let me count the ways.

On the Israeli side, I don't have the time or space to list all the ways the U.S. government has supported Israel. Whether it's through military technology sharing, financial aid, or geopolitical backing, America has been one of Israel's best friends. Just Google "American support of Israel to get an amuse bouche. (Link for the Lazy, here)

But the Palestinian side as well?

Yup: we, the American people, ponied up hundreds of millions of dollars in support of the Palestinian refugees, just in 2008?! Through the UN Relief and Works Agency for Palestinian Refugees, the U.S. has piped in millions of dollars into Gaza, the West Bank, Syria, Lebanon, &c. The United States was easily the largest individual contributor to the agency, providing close to a third of the entire budget.

Now, although it may seem like sending money to destitute refugee families is a noble pursuit, there's reason to believe that the generosity can be blamed (in part) for creating the state of perpetual conflict in the region. Allow a brief explanation: The majority of Palestinians have been living lives of extremes: on one hand is perpetual armed conflict with Israel*; on the other hand is a life of subsidy**.

But let's look at the deeper effects from both sides.

What does the subsidy do? It shelters the Palestinians from the abject poverty of their situation.

In a market society, families that are unable to feed the children they have will cease to bring more children into the world***. When there are insufficient resources, a free society will adapt: they'll either find more resources or, over time, create less mouths to feed. Not so in Palestine: even though it's one of the poorest groups in the world (scroll down to the 150's, in between Somalia and Kosovo), Palestinians continue to produce at very high levels (number 27, at over 5 children per woman). And, with the aid of UN-sponsored vaccines and food supplies, the Palestinians aren't a group that, unlike most of Africa, will die off in the usual "acts of God" and man-inspired violence that is tragically too common in poor regions.

And what is the deeper effect from the other half of the Palestinians lives, the perpetual battle with Israel? It raises a generation of boys and girls to only see their neighbors as an uncompromising enemy. It creates a people that can't even conceive of peaceful co-existence with people only 20 miles apart.

The Arab-Israeli conflict is a twisted snarl of emotions, politics, religion, and geography. What doesn't help, however, is the absolutely schizoid personality of America's foreign aid policy. I think it can be said that in this case, the U.S.'s profligate policies hurt people more than help them.
----------
*terrorist attack, subsequent IDF response, subsequent missile firing...rinse and repeat

**since there are unfathomably high unemployment numbers, the men of Gaza live on foreign aid. Since foreign aid is the only thing available, no one works...rinse and repeat

***yes, I'm aware this is a generality. When you get into demography, however, that's all you can use.

Last one out, turn off the lights.

2009-01-12T10:55:00.003-07:00

There's something poetic about this line in a report from the Detroit auto show.

By mid-morning, an estimated 5,000 journalists stood 10-deep to watch General Motors Corp. vehicles sashay down a fashion-show runway. Along the sidelines, 600 GM employees, retirees, and suppliers yielded signs and yelled cheers to support the company.

Employees, retirees, and suppliers. That's about all who's left in GM's corner.

Midwestern Western Bar Brawl

2009-01-12T10:21:00.004-07:00

So, at the greatest university EVAR, the Snow-mageddon happened this weekend.

On the occasion of the first sizeable snowfall in dear Ann Arbor town, the campus traditions dictate that two of the biggest dorms at UM, South Quad and West Quad (and which are conveniently located across the street from each other), engage in an honor-duel snowball fight.

I know, you all think “So what? Every college has snowball fights. Boring blog post, Snowden, I’m going back to my Facebook pag—“

Wait! Dear reader, tarry a while longer, there’s more!

There’s a hidden dynamic to the fight (and it is a fight): one of the dorms is the home to many of the freshman (and sometimes sophomore) Division I athletes. The other, mainly the university's "academic stars". So imagine with me one side, armed to the gills with high school All-American football and baseball players, and the other chock full of Science Olympiad captains and intelligent Theater Tech-Crew leaders. Think Detroit Red Wings vs. Park County Pee-Wee Hockey Team. It does not disappoint.

I was reminded of all this because of a thread at MGoBlog. Some highlights:

- "FYI - I took a giant ice-ball in the nuts. F****** baseball players"

- "The football players can get pretty nasty during the South Quad - West Quad snowball fight. In fact, two years ago [starting wide receiver] Greg Mathews shattered my roommate's ankle with a tackle during the fight. Honors kids vs. football players never was quite fair."

- "There was also like 5 fist fights. It reminded me of an old timey western bar brawl."

- "During the snowball fight, my friend got hit in the face... by a pumpkin."

- "The baseball players were fighting dirty towards the end, as the football players, namely Tay Odoms and Kenny Demens, started laying people out. The started throwing rocks and objects like peanut butter jars."

Awesome.

(!!!) I also just found this googling* around:

---------------
*That's right, I'm a googler.

Tales of Age

2009-01-10T16:42:00.002-07:00

I've just heard from several sources that the new hotness* in snark phrases is "nuke the fridge".

How did I miss out on this great phrase? I never got to see the original airing of the Happy Times episode, but I was there on opening night for fridge-nuking.

----
*And by "new hotness" I mean "cultural marker that was probably cool about 5 months ago and now already faded from leading wave of the internet. Popular with people who think that lolcats are cutting-edge. Anyone who uses this phrase should just give up on trying to stay relevant."

*Sigh*

I hate growing old.

Oliver, Aidan, Spencer, Finn -- Watch Yer Ass!

2009-01-10T09:51:00.005-07:00

I worked in a restaurant that served organic and locally-grown food. To describe the customers at this place as "health-conscious" is like describing John Nash as "numbers conscious". They were obsessed with every part of a recipe, even going so far as to insist upon supplying their own ingredients to the kitchen for their individual dishes (a maneuver that, while assuaging to hypochondriacal customers, is also against every health code in the Union). To summarize, these were some of the most food-aware people in one of the most food-aware towns in the world (Boulder). Most of these people could proudly tell you everything they had consumed in the past 48 hours and add where the food had been grown just so you could know even though it's no big deal no really.

Yet, for all this healthy living, a significant portion of the regular-customer base was diseased. I don't mean this as an insult. I would estimate that nearly 40% of the regulars were self-proclaimed sufferers of celiac disease. This meant that their small intestines, upon contact from gluten (a protein found in all forms of wheat), would practically shut down, flatten their walls out, and prevent absorption of nutrients. All in all, its a serious disease. In many cases, the real sufferers of the disease are forced to eat at home or at the few restaurants in their home town that offer gluten-free menus. In Boulder, however, celiacs have plenty of options, as many (if not most) restaurants have a gluten-free side menu.

Here's where it gets ridiculous. While I guess that nearly 2 in 5 of our customers were "celiacs", the accepted science says that only 1 in 133 people have the disease.

That means that this restaurant was an epicenter of the disease, a renowned center of support for celiacs, a statistical anamoly on the scale of 45x the normal proportion, or simply that the people of Boulder are fools who are desperate to have drama in their otherwise successful, educated, and upper-class lives. I think you can guess which option I (and 90% of the other waiters) thought was the answer.

So, in one of those blissful moments of op-ed column meeting one of my pet peeves, enters Joel Stein's L.A. Times piece. RTWT.

And genes certainly don't cause 25% of parents to believe that their kids have food allergies, when 4% do. Yuppiedom does.

Amen and Awesome.

Stein says most of what I think about food allergies, so I won't clog up your brains with too much more, but I would like to make a final point:

If this subculture of food fear, which we used to think utterly reasonable and practical, is basically a bunch of SoundN'Fury, what other deep fears in our society are, in reality, hollow?

coughcough*BigThreeAutoBankruptcy*cough*IllegalImmigration*coughcough*DrugLegalization*cough

Yikes, sorry 'bout that. Sound like I'm coming on with an allergy...

They Shoot Black People, Don't They?

2009-01-09T12:32:00.003-07:00

It's been the talk of my apartment for a few days now, so I'm surprised I haven't at least linked to the story of Oscar Grant, recent victim of murder in Oakland. The cops haven't nabbed the murderer yet, because, you see, he's a cop himself. Who was on duty. And got caught on camera. (Police brutality really starts about 2:30 in, you hear the gunshot at about 3:01, and see the dying Oscar Grant soon after. You were warned: it's ugly.)

Post from Reason's Hit And Run, also with some good comments below. Count me in the group who sympathizes with the rioters. There's no defensible reason why this "peace" officer is still outside a jail cell. What's really happening in this "investigation" by city officials and law enforcement is a CYA-fest. They're trying to determine how to simultaneously placate the angry citizens while abiding by some b.s. police union laws. The police want this man out of jail in only a few years, serving an involuntary manslaughter charge. The people (and a common sense view of justice), however, want this guy locked away for life.

As someone on indybay.org put it (summary): if the roles were turned around, and Oscar Grant and his buddies were pinning a police officer to the ground and killing him with a bullet-to-the-back, those kids would already be sitting on Death Row waitin' for the chair to cool down.

Profiles in Paternalism

2009-01-08T16:46:00.002-07:00

Peter Ubel sounds like a nice guy.

But sadly, as the saying goes "Nice Guys Finish Last In Economics Class And Yearn To Boss Every One Around". (that's not the saying you remember? Hm. Oh well. When in Rome...)

Evidenced here.

What’s wrong with free market theory? It doesn’t take into account our human nature.

First of all, I'd love to hear an acceptable definition of "human nature". Ubel brings up the examples of sleeping in instead of exercising and people's long commutes to work. It'd be the height of asininity, however, to suggest that these personal foibles are applicable to every person.

Secondly, free-marketeers are often accused of being reductionist towards individuals, that we reduce the human spirit down to a list of consumptions and habits. As spurious as the charge might be, no one in the free-market camp comes close to this kind of rhetoric:

In this book, I argue that the combination of human nature and free markets can be downright dangerous for our health and well-being. That government must step in and further regulate the markets that reward those who exploit our weaknesses. And, in the end, that good policy must take human nature into account-our rational and irrational sides, our strengths and our weaknesses.

Gee, my fragile little mind is no match for the power of corporations. I can't control myself in the face of all the sexy ads peddled by the fat cats of Madison Avenue. Whatever can I do?

/sarcasm

I give you all that background info on Dr. Ubel just so you can understand why a clearly intelligent man (from the greatest school evar) would write something for HuffPo that is as blinkeringly stupid as this:

In making this statement, Journal editorialists are flaunting their ignorance of human nature. As a physician, I have spent my clinical time caring for patients -- smokers, overeaters, under-exercisers -- who have been harmed by many of the products that these kind of libertarians would want us to free from regulation. As a behavioral scientist, I have studied how easy it can be to unconsciously influence people's behavior. As the father of 8 and 10 year-old boys, I have yearned for a government that is willing to step in, when necessary, to protect my kids from the harmfulness of our excessive consumerism.

See, guys? Dr. Ubel knows what's best for people, but he can't get what he wants because those bastard libertarians are preventing him from keeping his kids safe! Thank Science that President Obama will listen to Dr. Ubel! With his brains and Obama's might, all suffering will end!

Why, you ask? Because Dr. Ubel has studied people. Not just in surveys, man, but really studied them. He's looked into the abyss of a man's soul and divined the reasons for his actions. He's taken those reasons and weighed them against each other, and Solomon-esquely deigned which reasons are best and what behavior is preferred. All Dr. Ubel lacked was the Sword of the State, but his day has come!

/lastbitofsarcasm.

/really.

Localblogging: NoBo Fire

2009-01-07T20:20:00.004-07:00

60 mph winds knocked over a power line earlier today in North Boulder. As far as I know, the fire is mainly in open areas, but they evacuated surrounding homes anyway.

I got about 300 yards away. There was a closer spot, but the cops and 9 news had it on lockdown and wouldn't let any civvies close.

Rob Parker and The Laws of the Market

2009-01-07T14:09:00.004-07:00

So, Rob Parker’s a jerk. Who’s Rob Parker? If you don’t know, it’s not worth the time to learn about him, since he’s fading away, anyway.

Here’s the takeaway, though: Parker’s been let go from the Detroit News because he, in one of his bouts of genius, thought it would be “journalist-y” to ask Rod Marinelli, then-coach of the Detroit Lions (who’s son-in-law was an assistant coach), if Marinelli “ever wished [his] daughter married a better defensive coordinator”.

Classless, yada yada, got it. That kind of idiocy happens all the time. But the story of Parker's demise is a good time to look into the mechanisms of his career. Here's the look:

Any paper that has someone like Rob Parker on the staff should be able to fire him/her at any time. But this guy, after his miserable outburst, gets to write a few more columns and have the Newspaper Guild file a grievance on his behalf. (And he's even a picket-line-crosser! Way to stand up for your guys, Guild!)

This guy, who's been an idiot since the mid-90's (at least in a professional capacity), was allowed continue foisting pathetic attempts at controversy on the public through 2008. I don't know anyone who likes the guy, yet he's stayed employed for well over a decade longer than he probably warrants.

See, out here in the internets, people say all kinds of ridiculous crap all the time. What happens? People ignore it. Easy, right? In a purely meritocratic arena, Parker wouldn’t be able to make a single penny off his useless rhetoric. Maybe that's what will happen to him now.

Does that mean Parker's going to starve? Not at all. It means that he, just like every other journalist, will be forced to learn how to produce things that people want. Gone are the days of coasting by on a reputation of productivity, here are the days of reader-centric writing.

It's gonna be fun.

*exhale...*

/preachingtointernetchoir

Editor's note: expect more Death Of A Newspaper obituary stuff over the next day or two.

A New Year

2009-01-02T16:50:00.002-07:00

So, I'm back.

10 days off felt like a month. Don't let anyone tell you that the holiday season is just a time for celebration with friends and family: your boy Snowden spent his days uploading so much political philosophy, pop culture, and college football to his brain, he's ready to pop a blood vessel.

So, in the laziest of blogger traditions, I shall start the year with a list of crap I've kept my eye on in the past holy days...

- I think I'm late to this madness, but The Futurist blog is Right-Said Truth. I'm not gonna lie and say that his url doesn't freak me out a little (I'm not quite sure I'm down with The Singularity, and I know I'll be freaking out if it hits us in 2050. I'm only going to be 66 years old then! Given life-expectancy goals, that's like what, an eighth of my life? I want at least 100 years of semi-autonomy!*)

Anyway, he's got a killer post on Iraq. I've had this weird transition in my own view on the war (let's call it anarcho-capitalist brain creep), but those of you out there who've crowed that this war was a "lost cause" need to STFU and read the post. Especially since Your Boy Barack isn't as Cindy-Sheehan as you first thought.

- One of my Poorly Planned Resolutions of the Year 2009 (PPRotY2K9) is that I will Freecycle at least 5 things this year. I'm livin' in Boulder, so you know there's a huge pool of well-maintained-and-sustainable stuff just waiting to be traded. I'll do my best to get in the loop.

- For only being away 10 days, the number of hours I spent just bummin' around Cage Potato is both ridiculous and astounding (ridicu-stounding? astound-ulous?) It's gotta be at least 12 hours.

The upside, though? I have a couple new fighters to follow! To wit, Anthony Johnson and Shinya Aoki. I don't know how I missed Aoki, but any man who fights wearing full-leg tights gets my support and hetero man-crush.

- On the wonky side, I've been reading and re-reading The Rights of Man and essays from Molinari. Don't read 'em if you hate the feeling of indignation or the euphoric joy of comprehension.

- Finally, to let you view some of my daily behavior: I don't watch The Greatest Movie Of The 1990's on its namesake day, rather it's mandatory viewing for me around the beginning of each year. No movie is better at providing the viewer with emotional and philosophical reasons for hope and change. Stop on by here for other readings and discussion on the movie.

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*That little parenthetical rant might be the most-concentrated nerdiness ever written on this blog. I apologize. Don't worry if you only understand 8% of it, that means you lead a healthy and well-balanced life.

Green Dream Teams vs. New England Eye-Needles

2008-12-22T15:22:00.003-07:00

I know that Al Goreans get really irritated by this kind of anecdotal logic*, but I have to say that this:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President-elect Barack Obama's new "green dream team" is committed to battling climate change and ready to push for big policy reforms, in stark contrast with the Bush administration, environmental advocates said on Monday.

"If this team can't advance strong national policy on global warming, then no one can," said Kevin Knobloch, president of the Union of Concerned Scientists, referring to Obama's picks for the top energy and environment jobs in his administration, which takes office on January 20.

is just asinine.

Take it from me: I was at Mile High Stadium (Invesco edition) yesterday, freezing my “dream team” off in wind chill temperatures of well below zero. Furthermore, the state of Colorado has been breaking its “record low” temperatures so often we’ve changed the weather report to “How Much Frostbite You Should Expect On Your Outdoor Pets”.

The world ain't warming because of human activity, folks. It hasn't even warmed at all since 1998.

Peep this article, to see my point proven quite nicely:

"It's so cold, it feels like needles are pricking my eyes," grumbled 19-year-old Ashley Sarpong of Chicago, a fur-lined hood pulled around her face Sunday. "This is the coldest I've felt all year."

(Needles Are Pricking My Eyes is an emo-band title just waiting to be picked up, btw.)

Most of this grouchiness could probably be placed on my $*(!@#% Broncos choking themselves out of the playoffs but still: grumble, grumble.

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*Of course, never let it be said that the environmental Left never capitalizes on environmental events. Relatedly, I think this footnote is a good place to say that, even though I might not like Bush, I’m quite glad that JohnKerryWhoServedInVietnam never controlled the White House. Yeesh, what a doofus.